A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I'm a woman of 78 who has been alone a number of years. I joined a Senior Dating site recently. Now, this guy who's 68 contacted me. He is looking for a friend and a lover and asked me if I was interested. His first question to me was I still sexually active and would I be open to this type of relationship. There are so many older women around my area. I like the idea of a sexual relationship - but also I want companionship, a movie, a shared meal, filling up some of my lonely times. So, I ask why would a guy 10 years younger be interested in an older woman? And, if I should decide to go this route, is a condom necessary at an older age?
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 May 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks to those who responded to my questions. I decided that I wanted more than sex from the guy who had contacted me. He said he was moving to Arkansas once his house sold. So, why get something started if and when he could move away. And, yes, if I ever get sexually involved I will use protection. Again, thanks to all who answered my questions.
A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (17 April 2011):
 In my opinion, all previous responders offered good advice. I'm 63-years-old in Texas and have experienced both good and (not so good) relationships, but it's kind of like fishing. You put a lure out there, and see who/what bites. As "TasteofIndia" advises, use your instincts, or what I call intuition.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 April 2011): Its not really about age. Its personalities. As he has said hes looking for a friend AND lover. Theres no reason why you cant have both companionship with this guy and sex, should you wish. Its best to talk to him and make clear that you expect companionship as well, not just sex. Try a few dates with him first and see what you think of him. Follow the usual precautions, meet somewhere public, tell a friend about him/ when and where you are going. And dont give out your personal information until you get to know him.Always use condoms no matter what he tells you and steer clear of oral sex unless hes prepared to go with you and be checked first at a sexual health clinic. Also bare in mind as his opener was about sex. He might have more than a few women already in his little black book. So its a good idea to check and make sure that any friends with benefits relationship you have with him will be exclusive.
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A
female
reader, cupidus  +, writes (16 April 2011):
 My current guy is 20 years difference, my last guy 11 years between our ages and the one before that 15 years.It's got zero to do with age. It's how the hearts and minds blend. Mind you it can break up, but not because of age it'll be something else all together. If it fills a void for you than that's what it does.Take it and embrace it, if it's what you need. Looking to deeply can really ruin alot of NOW WOW moments.And as I've said somewhere here before.That's what life is. A series of moments.
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A
female
reader, The Girl with the Diver's Hair  +, writes (16 April 2011):
Go for it it could be something which you will blossom and yes always wear a condom not matter what! Good LuCk
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A
female
reader, TEM +, writes (16 April 2011):
 You ask some tough questions. I'll deal with the easy one first. If you have sex a condom is a must. It is your protection against sexually transmitted disease, which happens to be very much on the rise among senior citizens. Google "STDs and senior citizens" and see what you come up with. It's a real eye-opener.
This man sounds like he is sexually active (all the more reason to insist on a condom) and wants to date someone else who is open to that type of a relationship. Why? Maybe he has found that many women his own age are simply not interested in sex, and he wants to make sure the next woman he dates is.
The fact that that was his first question to you is a little troublesome. If you were to rank what you want in a relationship, would you put having a sexual relations at the top of your list? As far as the age gap goes, don't knock yourself. He must be attracted to you or he wouldn't have asked.
My advice is to get to know him, however. Go on enough dates to get a feel for where this man is coming from and whether or not you want to get into an intimate relationship with him. If his idea of dating is hopping in the sack, I'd kick him to the curb. Don't settle for anything less than you want and deserve.
Best of luck,
TEM
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (16 April 2011):
 Hello!
YES a condom is necessary. I've been reading that STI's are a growing issue for folks in your age bracket! Be sure you are being 100% careful and protecting yourself. Here's some more info:
http://std.about.com/od/stdsspecificcommunities/a/elderlystd.htm
If the first thing a fella asks you about is your sex life, it's doubtful he's interested in much companionship. It sounds like he is mostly interested in sex! So I might keep looking around for someone who is looking for the same thing you are. I don't think the age difference means much - but I do think he's made it quite clear what he's looking for, and I get the idea that it's not quite what you're interested in.
Best of luck to you, be cautious with people you meet online. Listen to your gut instincts and protect yourself! Enjoy!
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