A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I backed into something last night in boyfriends new car and now he is not speaking to me after though he was rude and acts like i did it on purpose. How long will he be mad? It isnt even a big dent (2in) also how should i handle it we live together Reply to this Question
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (16 July 2013):
 It may not be a big dent, but it is a fresh dent on a new, till then immaculate, dent-free car. It's undrstandable he is upset. Maybe he is TOO upset and he is not handling this very graciously - neither you are. The first words that should have been coming out from your mouth are " I am so sorry " and " but don't worry, I'll take care of getting it fixed immediately ".
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2013): You dented someone else's car, so you are responsible to get it fixed.
He has a right to be angry at you, because you were careless with his belongings. And the fact that you downplay it saying it's not a big dent, shows disrespect. It is HIS car, and YOU damaged it, and you expect him to just shrug it off? that IS rude!
Look, if it was YOUR car, then if you get to decide if a dent is trivial or not and if you want to bother to get it fixed or not. But this is not your car, it's his. It's disrespectful to act like it's yours.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (15 July 2013):
 you call your insurance and you FIX it if you can't afford to pay for it out of pocket. that's how you handle it.
my now husband dented my car when we were dating... he whipped out a wad of bills and pealed off the amount needed to cover the insurance co-pay. we were DATING... not engaged. NOT living together.
WHEN you break something of someone's you FIX it.
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A
female
reader, Ciar  +, writes (15 July 2013):
 I agree that you should offer to have it fixed. It may be a small dent in the car, but it will lead to a bigger dent in his finances.
It isn't just about the cost of repairs, it's that he HAD a flawless new car and now he doesn't. It's also the possibility that this will go through his insurance and if it does it will be an 'at fault' acident on his record which will increase his premiums for years to come. Are you a listed driver on his policy or do you have yuor own? Who pays for the insurance?
The other thing you can do is not come across as dismissive and not minimize what you did by pointing out that 'it isn't even a big dent' or asking how long he's going to be mad.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (14 July 2013):
 Please advise what kind of car it is.... as that will affect my response.......
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2013): Fix it
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (13 July 2013):
Handle it by:
a) fixing it
b) paying more attention next time
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (13 July 2013):
 I would look into what it will cost to have it fixed and then offer PAY for it.
It's not about the size of the dent. I'm pretty sure he knows you didn't do it on purpose, but you still put a dent into his car.
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