A
female
age
30-35,
*needadvice
writes:when I was in 8th grade, 13 years old, I became extremely close with my teacher. He was always there for me and I spent a lot of free time with him. I truly admired/still admire him and I have very strong feelings for him. It's years later and I haven't gotten over how I feel. We still remain in contact a little bit. I always thought that I needed closure and to say goodbye to him in order to get over him. But after seeing him recently, I realized that I don't want closure and I would really love to become friends with him. I'm too embarrassed to tell him or anyone else about this because it just seems so weird to feel this way about a teacher. I don't know what to do.. we get along great and he always makes me feel so wonderful about myself. I don't know if I'd ever be brave enough to do it, but does anyone have advice on how I could progress our relationship without actually saying it/seeming like a creepy obsessive ex student? I don't know what to do but I really value him and his advice and I would always wonder if I never tried to create a relationship between the two of us.
View related questions:
my teacher Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Amy2007x  +, writes (30 December 2007):
 Well i am in love with my teacher and would love to get his email address now but i guess al have to wait til i leave which is in a couple of months.
This is what i would do if i were u - tell me if u think its a stupid idea but wht about this:
You lie to him (sounds harsh but i think it'll work) u email him text him whtever form of communication u have of him askin him for sum extra tutition if it wouldnt be any trouble BCOZ... ur thinkin of goin to college and studyin a course (his subject =]) and gettin extra tutition would mean u canb spend more time with him, so yeah anyways u wnt sum private tution as u are interested in studyin this course thing, after a couple of weeks u thank him and say can i take u to lunch sum time to say thanks?
blah blah u never into the course and tell him that (but its all a lie you see)
infact tht is a patheitc plan, i dno :S
how about u tell him that he ment alot to you like respect wise and he inspired youto do so much more with your life that nit doesnt seem right that you and him jsut lost all contact one day , say to him he was a really good teacher and say that you hope you and him can talk a bit more, or infact pop into your old skl and give him a surprise visit thats wht all the ppl in my skl do once they left they all bk and visit this one guy (the dude i love) coz he is amazing... i have it all planned out on my last day im gonna give hima thankyou card and everythin then ask for his email address haha
well i never helped u out soz
but mail me coz i do have sum more ideas
xx
A
female
reader, ineedadvice +, writes (24 December 2007):
ineedadvice is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI definitely understand where you're coming from with that question. I used to hate people who said stuff like this because I thought it was so stupid, but now I understand. I mean my situation's a little different because there's not as big of an age difference. I was saying 15 years just to round it off but it's actually 14, I'm 16 and he just turned 30. Also, I think the reason might be because I've always been pretty mature for my age. I spend and always have spent a lot of time with my older cousins who are all about 30 so I'm already used to hanging out with people his age. Also, I went through a lot in 8th grade and for whatever reason my teacher was the one who helped me through it all and I became very attached to him during this time. We spent a lot of time together and he shared personal things with me and knew practically everything about me. I'm not like looking at him and saying wow he's hot I want to hook up with him, I have an emotional attachment to him that I can't ignore.
...............................
A
female
reader, ineedadvice +, writes (24 December 2007):
ineedadvice is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell I am only sixteen
sorry I didn't mean to make it seem like I'm thirty with that last response, I meant when I turn 30 it's not going to seem like as big of an age difference as it does now. Also, it's not that I'm afraid of progressing the friendship, just that I don't know how to go about doing that because even though I don't care about the age difference I'm afraid he does and that I seem like a little kid even though he hasn't been my teacher for years now
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2007): Why are so many teenage girls on this site in love with their male teachers who are so much older? I mean, one of the other posts was from a girl who's 17 and says she's in love with her 55-year-old male teacher. How could this be? And would a girl so young actually want to have sex with man who is so much older than she is? What could possibly be the attraction here?If any women can explain how or why this happens, please do so. It just doesn't make sense how a 15 y.o. girl, or even an 18 or 19 y.o. woman, could fall in love with a man in his 40s or 50s.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 December 2007): Hi Babe... your age says you are only 16-17 and if he is a teacher he is definitely over 18! PLEASE wait until you are legal... if you want a real chance of a healthy relationship with him... wait. You don't want him going to jail for you, right?! Seriously... just wait until your 18.
...............................
A
female
reader, ineedadvice +, writes (23 December 2007):
ineedadvice is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI really appreciate the advice but I'm afraid you may have misinterpreted what I'm saying. When I say that I want to create a relationship between the two of us, I don't mean sexual or anything, I mean a friendship. I hang out with kids my own age and do all other normal things. I've barely had contact with him for years, but my feelings still haven't gone away. He's not my teacher anymore so it really isn't all that wrong. I just really value the friendship that I feel we've had so far and wish it could develop into more of a real friendship than an authoritative type of friendship. I just love talking to him and besides, our age difference isn't THAT huge.. it seems larger because I'm younger but 15 years isn't all that much when I'm 30 and he's 45 you know?
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 December 2007): look chicky my best advice 2 U is 2 just tell him whats the WORST that could happen,he says no
...............................
|
