A
male
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:There is a group of girls who are my type, but they all hate me because of something that I said to someone: I told someone that I didn't like them when I was going out with them, then all of her friends in that group hated me. I think they like me now, but no-one wants to go out with me because of that comment. They are to scared that I will do that to them. I was having troubles at home so I wanted to take my anger but I did it on the wrong person. What should I do now to get them liking me as before? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2012): If you explained and said sorry to the girl whos feelings you hurt. But they are all still sulking with you, then i would leave them be. They will forget about it soon if you arent around them too much. It is a `group/gang` thing. Probably half of them think what you did wasnt THAT bad, some might still like you. But they have to seem to act as one so they can stay in the friendship group. Just move away from them a little and give it some more time. If you hang around them too much and keep trying to infiltrate their group it might just make them more determined to freeze you out. So give them less attention and let them fixate on someone else for a while. And do remember in future, when you upset a girl, you automatically upset her friendship group. Its a sisterhood thing! So always think carefully before saying something you may later regret. Women can be tricky! All the best.
A
female
reader, bardia  +, writes (15 February 2012):
 At this point, you might just let it alone. If you encounter any of them, just be kind. They will see if you've really changed by your actions. And again, if they don't, then just wait. High school does end eventually & you'll have a chance for a fresh start. Work on yourself & you never know who might be watching...
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 February 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice, but they haven't forgotten it and it was in September! I know that fancying them would be pointless as I said before, they are all too scared, and when I asked a girl out, she talked about that so I had to pretend it was a joke. Should I leave them be?
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A
female
reader, bardia +, writes (15 February 2012):
The best thing to do is sincerely apologize to that person, first one on one. Explain the situation. Everyone has a bad moment where they are under stress from something else and take it out on other people. Try to be more mindful and careful about doing that. Just because we get mad at one person doesn't mean we can take it out on the next (and everyone needs to remember this, not just you). In the meantime, apologize, ask for forgiveness and then slowly try to move on with them. Don't push. They should understand. And if they don't, then maybe they're not the right kind of friends to be with, because friends know how to forgive. Hang in there.
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