A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Hi, I will try and keep this short. Basically I am 3 months pregnant to my live-in boyfriend. Before I got pregnant (this time), his ex (who has a new partner and child) would call him every week or so and despite us being together for 2 years, I have never met her. Quite frankly, I question her motives when she rang at 4am in September (and all other days/times of week). he then told her to stop contact. looked in his phone today, realised she rang him a week ago 4 his birthday. he never told me this. i 'casually' asked if he'd heard from her. he did tell me and said he didn't tell me at the time cos i've been grumpy (aka hormonal buddy!). apparently he told her he didn't want to speak to her and hung up. of course now i'm wondering if there is more to it? i was pregnant earlier in the year, had an operation to remove baby after it miscarried and who was calling him the morning i got out of hosp? yep her. so it's all the time. well it was??another girl goes to his nightclub where he works every 2 weeks, texts him often, makes him CDs etc etc - haven't met her either - after the miscarriage we went on vacation - who was texting him at 8am one morning? her...i know i am jealous at the best of times, and now i'm hormonal too, but would this bother anyone else??? help... i couldn't help but speak my feelings to him, so now he thinks i'm psycho because little miss innocents would never show their dark side... HELP! thank-you!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionTHANKS SO MUCH FOR YOUR RESPONSE - it has really helped me! I only have 4 weeks to go in the pregnancy now and have things a lot more under control than when I posted this!
thank-you, thank-you!
A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (29 December 2010):
The ex thing would definitely bother me. This other girl, not so much. He's being honest with you about these communications. He's not hiding them. Even when you snooped and asked him, he told you without knowing you already knew. These aren't the actions of someone cheating or hiding something. You need to trust your man.
He has put his foot down about the ex. You can't hold the past things against him as long as he holds firm there. Base your feelings on his actions.
It's unnecessarilly nosy to want him to detail every call he makes to you. That's controlling and just horrible behavior. The same goes for texts. Don't get jealous unless he's spending all his time with you texting other people.
You need to get your jealousy in check or it will cost you your man. It's good that you're communicating about it, just do your best to trust him. It seems, based on what you've said, that he is trust worthy.
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