A
female
age
36-40,
*andycane1234
writes:I have a question about porn and ed. I have come to discover stories of men who have trouble getting erect over a real woman when they have used porn alot. Is that because those porn women are hotter? Would they still have that problem if a woman did look like them?
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female
reader, Miamine +, writes (22 March 2012):
 Sorry we missed your follow up... "He had to think extra dirty thoughts in his head whilst having sex with me to try and cum. Is this because the porn is hotter?"
Candycane, first you must realise that this is nothing to do with you. It's not your problem, it's his. Most men don't go saying things like "I need to think extra dirty for my dick to come up."
It could be for many reasons
He could have used so much porn that he can't get turned on by normal sex with a human woman. In that case the porn has to go.
Your relationship could be wrong for him, maybe he's not in love or he doesn't fancy you and he doesn't know how to say it.
He may have issues with sex, sometimes people are taught that sex is bad and find it difficult to have a proper relationship.
We can't tell, you really haven't provided enough information. How much porn does he use? How often does he masturbate alone. How long have you two been together. Have you and him always had sexual problems. How often do you and him have sex. How long has this ED problem been going on? You say he can get erection but only by having "extra dirty thoughts", does this also happen when he is masturbating alone. Is he romantic and loving, kissing you and touching you outside bed. Has he been to the doctor to ask about treatment for ED? Has he had problems with his erection in other relationships? How old is this guy?
You don't have the problem, he does, do not blame yourself, do not blame porn, it's him that has this problem, and you need his help to fix it. Get him to answer them questions, and also if you can, ask him about these "extra dirty thoughts"... he may have a fetish, a kink, that he needs to get aroused.. eg, spanking or something.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2012): He had to think extra dirty thoughts in his head whilst having sex with me to try and cum. Is this because the porn is hotter?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2012): Lets put this "hotter" in perspective....are those women "really" hotter? Really? For starters...what KIND of women does porn to begin with...ya, screwed up, no self worth women who allows a screwed up, no self worth male do all kinds of degrading things to her body so primarily men, can jerk off solo. They spend tons of money to create a fake body, have no idea what a healthy intimate and meaningful relationship is....ya, they are certainly hotter....NOT.As far as ED....there is likely a connection if a young male spends a great deal of time watching porn. I suppose they would have some performance anxiety and a lot of disappointment if they actually believe themselves and their partner will be able to perform and put on the same kind of show as porn stars do because it's so far from what's real. I believe it would become a bigger issue as a male gets older and ED is a lot more common. I think the only way a male could know for sure is to remove themselves from anything related to porn, find something else to do with all that time on their hands and try engaging 100% with a real women for an extended period of time,wow, what a concept.
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A
male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (11 March 2012):
 Too much porn and masturbation screws up a guy's ability to have normal sex with a woman, in my opinion. Pornography was rather hard to come by when I was growing up in the 1950s-60s, so sex required reality. As a freedom loving American, I have no objection to the now widespread availability of pornography, but it's up to the individual whether or not to become addicted to it. Personally, it doesn't do much for me because it is fantasy. Reality is much better.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 March 2012): no its not true, i have watched porn since i was able to have a erection, masturbated every day several times sometimes in a day. i never had a a problem, the only problem you will have is that you cum much quicker than other guys, that's it. im now 20. i have a wife and have no problem getting a erection to her.
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A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (10 March 2012):
That's abuse of porn and masturbation, they have wanked themselves silly and now the penis doesn't work. It's nothing to do with the pictures or porn, it's too much masturbation on their own so they don't know what to do when they get a real woman home.
If the ED problem is caused by this, it can be easily fixed. Porn and masturbation must be banned in this case and then there are techniques you can use so that they learn how to have sex with people again.
However many men have ED problems caused by age, by health, and by stress or unhealthy lifestyles and many men use porn frequently or infrequently and never have any problems.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (10 March 2012):
 This is an interesting article on it:
http://yourbrainonporn.com/erectile-dysfunction-and-porn
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A
male
reader, Uncle PJ  +, writes (10 March 2012):
 It sounds like that problem you're referring to is symptoms of addiction. It is a psychological thing that unfortunately you girls can't do anything about. Once a guy has forced the idea that what turns him on is watching porn or a certain porn type, then it becomes difficult to be turned on by anything else because of the routine he has created for himself. It's not necessarily what the girls look like that causes them to watch porn so it probably wouldn't make much difference in reality. The best thing that you can do as a 'real' woman is to not compare yourself to a porn star.To help his situation he must stop watching porn for a lengthy amount of time, it must be a least a matter or months. If he is truly addicted then it will be a struggle to begin with but as long as he has support or even sees a therapist, they should get through it. Once that psychological state has been erased or at least altered, he should be able to return to normal sex and have a happy sex life with REAL women.
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