A
female
age
30-35,
*omma_2
writes: My fiance for 15 months has lied over and over and im sooo tired of all da lies.. We always argue and he always makes me feel bad like its my fault... When we argue he is always rude and says hurtful things and says he is gonna take our daughter away from me when he gets mad... Today we had a big argument and we said we would start ova but 2 hours after our fight he lied again... Sometimes he lies about big things and sometimes lil things... We can neva jus stay happy for a whole week cuz he always lies bout something.. We jus had a daughter bak in august and he still lies... I dont know wat ta do anymore... I love him sooo much but im at my breakin point wit all these lies.. I dont want my daughter ta have her parents split up like my first daughter has... I dont honestly know why i have dealt wit this as long as i have... It seems like it is neva eva gonna end... Its like he has a problem wit lying.. I told him we need ta go ta counseling and if dat dont work then we will neva work... He says he loves me more than anything but if he really did he wouldnt need ta lie all da time, rite? I honestly jus dont know wat ta do anymore and im tired of not bein happy... I dont like being single and i dont wanna be all alone wit 2 kids... And i dont think i could find anybody else who would want me wit 2 kids... I feel like i have let dis go on way tooo long but i have tried ta end it but once he leaves i want him bak no matta wat he has done or lied about... Wat should i do?? This counseling is da last straw and if it dont work how can i handle da break up?? How can i go on wit my life without him cuz i love him sooo much.. Plz help me he is driving me crazy...
View related questions:
fiance, split up Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, SuddenlyConfusedAgain +, writes (26 November 2009):
From an outsiders point of view.. DUMP HIM! A few white lies are harmless, but this guy sounds unreal. I personally hate liars, they don't change. And for your kids sake, it would be better for them if ye split. You will be fine on your own, it will be hard, but in time (and give yourself plenty of time) you will realize how much better off you are without him.
I know its not what you want to hear, but sorry honey, in my opinion this guy just is not good enough.
You say you don't want to be single, but you have to be strong, you don't need a man, its not like you'll be lonely, you have two kids who need their Mom to be a happy and strong woman, not worn down by your guys lies.
I hope you leave him, good luck xx
A
female
reader, Ihurt2 +, writes (26 November 2009):
A lie is a lie, nomatter how big or small it is. The problem isn't you so don't allow yourself to think you are doing something wrong when it is him that cannot be trusted. If he is willing to try counselin it never hurts to try, but you are at your breaking point. Is he at his changing point? Are you ready to deal with his lies post-counceling? It's hard to be alone, with kids, but is i worth the anxiety? Or pain that you feel when he comes home with endless excuses? Then to top it off he gets mad at you?? He has issues, and part of it is he sounds very selfish. Good luck and stay strong for your babies!
...............................
|