A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey:) i'd just like an opinion on this please of what you think is going on. I've liked this lad for nearly 2 years and everyone thought he liked me. It was obvious he did but nothing was ever done, i was very shy and also this girl who also liked him started bullying me and turning people against me so it was hard for me and this lad to even be friends. Anyway about a year later he liked another girl, she hurt him and all through out this he alwyas showed that he liked me.Anyway came to maybe 2 weeks before we were due to leave college for good and one of his mates added me i hadn't got a clue who she was then i realised and she just startd asking stuff like how i knew him and telling me what a great guy he was. She wanted us all to meet up, i spoke to another friend and it turns out she was gonna try and get us together(me and this lad), that she just wnated to make us happy, but wasn't sure if she should get involved. The next thing i knew was that he told her that he didn't like me and that i stalked him which shocked her.Anyway that girl he liked that hurt him wanted him again throughout the last month of college, now that her bf was in cyprus and she was lonely. They went out for a week, never saw each other and when it came to seeing each other she ignored him and called it off. Not very nice!This is were it got nasty...i wasn;t aware of any of this until this lad told one of our mates but apprantly he was blaming me for them spliting up, apprantly i had sai something to this girl about me and this lad being a couple and id said something to her to mak her call it off, he said he hated me and never wanted to see me again. he wishes he could loose contact with me but appantly i kept coming back. Which was one BIG LIE because i'd seen him once before then at a mates house so i'd hardly spoken to him or anything! Oh yea he gave me a lift to and from our mates house as well and the girl that he was going out with had ago at him and made it out that he was going to se me. The thing is she knows we are both not like that! HE also told a lot of crap to that mate or ours that day when he said about me ebing to blame like saying that he;d had sex with some girl on holiday when we all know he hadn't because hes not like that and he doesnt believe in sex before marriage, he also said that our mates from outside college were now his not mine! You can tell none of thats true! In a way its like hes trying to make people think he hates me when he really doesnt! (me and quite afew others think that ebcause of stuff we've seen)Also regarding his mate that added me and starte talking to me, she asked me who he was going out with, i told her, turns out he;d never mentioned her before to her. So this is becoming very obvious what this lad told his mate to start her talking to me! His family also seemed to have an idea of who i was when i first saw them. They're lovely people!Anyway i met up with him not long ago and i brought this up. He said i'm not to blame and told me what happened which was half the story i got told before + anothr bit. It was true this girl had tried to blame me for not wanting to be with him and she made it out like he was seeing me behind her back! Now why would eithe rme or him do that. If he doesn;t like me in that way why would she think that unless she knew something i didn;t. I told him he can check what ever he likes on my pc i have not spoken to her he told me he doesn;t blame me he blames the people for keep bringing me up because alot of people say stfuf about us. Apprantly she told him the real reason in the end he did tell me, t was something to do wiht someone else and that it would never work. Everyone knew it wouldn;t and she just wanted attention, he was nothing special to her of course he doesn;t see that though! He also said that at the end he said to her i don;t think u've spoken to (my name) before have you! and se apprantly asked him if he hated me and he said why would he hate me. and stuff. Parts of it i believe other bits i don't. At the end of the night i said are we ok with each other then and he said yea. About an hour later i got a text that put my mind to rest! it was off him saying promise me you wont tell anyone what we spoke aboyt etc, he needs someone he can trust im a great friend to him always have been he new i wouldn;t do it and as long as i don;t say owt he;d know he have a real true friend! and that it as great to see me that night!So yea i thin we're ok with each other now i just dont get what goes on half the time! Do you really think he meant it? We were very good friends for quite a while before, we had alot of good times togethr and stuff! Seriously i am trying to egt ove rhim and live without him! He now knows i don;t wanna be with him so he can get that out of his head i just want to be friends! I hope he meant what he said to me what do you think? Also i know this is like totally irrelivant but do you think he DID have feelings for me at some point? Alot of stuff happened in the past that said he did and stuff! I know he probabbly doesnt now but i;d just like to put my mind to rest. I don;t think he knows what he wants! But do you think he meant it!?Thanks for any help and i know hes not worht it trust me ive had enough of it and im not gonna watse my time anymore jsut please help me put my mind to rest!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (15 July 2009):
 If he ever had feelings for you in the past he sure didn't show it very well. I think you can consider friendship as far as this ever can go. But I'm not sure I'd even want him as a friend to tell you the truth. But no matter what it's time to get on with your life.
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