A
female
age
30-35,
*reston
writes:Ok so i met my ex boyfriend last August. As soon as we met, we fell for each other, there was just such a strong bond between us. So much so that he came up to see me the following weekend as we couldn't bare to be apart any longer. Yeah so basically he lives in Southampton, and i live in the Midlands, so there's quite a big gap there. But we were willing to make it work. When he came up the following weekend, he asked me out, and he told me he loved me. I was quite shocked, but i was so happy. When he had to go back home, i was really upset, i didn't want to be away from him. We had had such an amazing weekend together, he made me feel so special and treated me really well. We couldn't see each other for a month after that because of various things that were happening on the weekends etc, but we always called each other. He told me that he once he'd finished college that he'd move up here to live with me, that he wants to take me away on a holiday and so many other things, it made me so happy to think that we would still be together next year so we could do these things together.So anyway, we broke up 6 months ago and were only together for about 2 months. He had been flirting quite badly with a girl who goes to my school, who hates me, and was doing it to get back at me. I was so hurt by it, but i had to forgive him. Since then i felt like i couldn't trust him any longer, and things just weren't the same. When i confronted him about it, he said he felt that our relationship had faded, and even though we didn't want to split up, we couldn't see any other way out. Considering how i felt towards the end of the relationship, i thought i would be fine with it, but i was the complete opposite. I cried myself to sleep for weeks, everything reminded me of him, and it didn't help the fact that we were still in contact.Then one day i found out that he had a new girlfriend, i thought that he still cared about me, so when i asked him about it he simply said "I have to move on sometime" It was a big wake up call for me, but they've been together for about 2 months now, and i'm still not over him!I really do not know what to do anymore. I don't talk to him now because it's too awkward, but the memories of how happy he made me are still there, and i can't forget!It's easy to say things like "You have to distract yourself" Well i've tried that, and everything else i can think of, but it's still no use. I felt so strongly about him, and i could actually imagine myself with him for the rest of my life, that's how happy he made me.I really need some advice on what to do?Or if you've been in a similar posistion, i want to hear your story.Thanksss !
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2010): There is nothing anyone can say or do to fix it.Your mind is stuck something like obsessive people keep washing their hands a hundred times to get clean.You are resisting what has happened probably reliving the past over and over.
The only thing you can do is realize what your mind is doing.Observe how your mind is obsessing.Probably saying stuff like if I only did things differently it would have turned out right.I felt so good so special.If I had another chance I could ...
Live in the moment Now.Do all you can to make the situation as good as it can be NOW. Accept he is gone for Now and you can not control his decisions. Accept what has happened and the pain will go away.
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