A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi I am from the Caribbean.I am a 32yr old African Origin woman that is in a relationship with a 61 yr old White French man.My parents hate our relationship. People make fun of us and stare at us. I am a hard working woman, I have a normal job and divourced and so is he.I am fed up with the way people judge us. They think that I am with him for money or they think that I am a working prostitue. This is a normal relationship like any other.Relationships with the people our own age have had its server problems. For me the guys are always cheating on me. For once in my life I have found someone who actually apreciates who I am and loves me for the things that I do and enjoy.Please help me? Why are people so judgemental.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 July 2007): You love him so dont listen to what other people say. Its your life, not theirs. Just follow your heart.
A
female
reader, ladybug  +, writes (17 June 2007):
 You love him, right? and youre happy, right? just seek for the benefit of your relationship and dont mind those people who talk behind your back, they tend to do that because they are not happy with their lives and they are jealous of what you have! there's nothing wrong about you, the mistake is with those people, they will tend to talk and talk negative things about you because that makes them feel superior and destroy your relationship. Just dont let yourself be affected by those,,enjoy your life and they will also enjoy their KARMA.
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A
female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (17 June 2007):
 It doesn't matter that people are judgemental...you have found the sort of happiness that many people can only dream about and frankly you should treasure it. Stop worrying about what other people think and stay strong. My parents were very opposed to an age-gap relationship that I had with my now husband. They didn't speak to me for 2 years and lots of his friends made rude comments about the age-gap of 10 years (me being older). Some of my acquaintances made sly comments about him being with me to get a visa (he is an immigrant) or gold-digging...The fact is that sometimes you have to stand up for what you want out of life and that means going out with some armour plating on to defend yourself against nasty comments. A lot of people will just be jealous or narrow-minded about your relationship but I am sure you are not going to let a bunch of bigots stop you having some fun surely?
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (17 June 2007):
 Part of the problem is that only too often it is true that people from poorer societies get involved with people from richer societies just to get a visa.
Now, people who are judgmental do not stop to think that there is another side to this coin: that many people from richer societies come to our countries to make the most out of their money. But they are not judged as hard as you will be, madam.
I understand your situation because it happened to me. The difference is, it was the woman I loved who thought that I was only after her money. The truth is, there is nothing you can do about what people WANT to think. People will always feel that you are with him for his money, no matter what. It's not who you are what counts; it's the color of your skin. It's hard, but you'll have to learn to live with this.
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