A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: i thought the hymen was like the bit right at the front of the inside of your vagina...the first time i had sex it was very painful but i didnt bleed and it wasnt really a stabbing pain like everyone says it felt like my gut was being streched. after a couple of times, it got less painful when he first went in (it stopped hurting completely ) so i thought i had completely lost my v, and broken my hymen. but when me and my boyfirend have sex (we have only done it about 5 or 6 times altogether and he was my first) he said he can only go in about 4 inches (he is 6inches) it doesnt feel painful at all when he is pushing inside me but is this normal? he thinks its because my hymen hasnt broken yet but i didnt think the hymen was 4 inches inside ? i heard the depth of the vagina is about 4 inches but when your aroused its supposed to expand and so he should be able to go all the way in as i am aroused when we are having sex ? is it normal that he can only go in about 4 inches ? all my friends (who have had sex for longer) say their boyfirends can go all the way in... help .... everyone says there must be something wrong with me !! help xx
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 April 2008): I had a girlfriend with this same problem, of about your age. We saw each other for a year, had intercourse about 10 times, and each time it was the same thing you describe. We kept in touch after breaking up. A couple of years later, she asked if I was seeing anyone, which I wasn't, and then came to visit me. She completely attacked me sexually, which I of course did not resist. I penetrated her fully, as with all other women before and since, but it was the first time with her.
She explained to me afterwards that she had had two issues which were taken care of by her doctor, and she wanted to feel what it was like with me without those issues. The two issues were first, that she did have a growth that was almost like a second hymen, about halfway into her vagina, and second, that her vagina was unusually tight, to the point that she needed to be stretching it out in order to make intercourse less painful (which she had done -- though it still felt tight to me). So I'd advise you to go to your OB and be checked out for this after describing the problem specifically, as she did.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2008): Maybe its hard for him to enter you all the way is because you're not completey aroused. What is he doing to arouse you. Maybe you guys should keep the foreplay going on a litte longer. Try different things to arouse each other and set the mood. Light candles listen to music, etc. Both of you should lose the tension and just loosen up. Hope this helps.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2008): Just to clarify that you lose your virginity as soon as you have intercourse whether you bleed or not, whether your hymen breaks etc etc. When you have sex. you loses your virginity.
I think that your boyfriend is either too worried about hurting you or actually is uncomfortable in some way himself. There should be no reason that you can not have full penetration. Perhaps its worth telling him that you are fine with it but ask if there is anything he is not telling you. If he is in discomfort then something needs to be done.
I think you are normal, you just need to work on it - vaginas can be a lot bigger than 4 inches, look at some of these huge sex toys and porn stars about - someones got to beable to cope with them!
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