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anonymous
writes: I have been with my partner for 2 years. The sex has always been pretty bad really - very infrequent and of bad quality. He seems extremely frigid and scared to make any moves and it has really frustated me! We have discussed it lots of times and never got very far. It came to a head the other day and he confessed to having been to see a dominatrix a few years ago, being tied up etc, and that is what he likes. Now I am very confused. A person who has always seemed asexual is suddenly into this? He has started to see a counsellor to work on our relationship - but I really dont know whether I can be bothered to stay.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 August 2005): Your man has divulged some really quite personal info, so handle it with care! It may be that some really quite simple steps from you would help -- taking the initiative, perhaps using some simple restraint (belt?). I would have thought worth a try?
A reader, Starr, writes (5 February 2005): This isn't that much of a problem.The answer is quite clear to me.Indeed the sex might not be to your standards but if you love him and want to make things work,it won't hurt to try something new and possibly interesting.So he likes to be dominated well, give it a try what can it hurt if the sex life is already bad how much worse can it be?you might spark a new wave of ideas and that just might become the breakthrough of a brand new wonderful sex life between the two of you(as well as help you to relieve some stress).The answer could be looking you both right in the face.Tie the man up, Spank him.That might be what sets him off and you get the sex you've been trying to achieve from him.
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