A
male
age
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*rophybrown
writes:My partner and I have sex on occasion. We were with friends and my partner discussed in front of our friends "gettin some tonight" I had plans to go for a walk with my daughter later in that night. I was given a choice between the walk and "getting some" I told my daughter I could not take the walk tonight and of course she was not pleased with me. With that said we got home and went to bed where my partner declined on the gettin some part after I was all hot and bothered. My partner did not say I am sorry, make another date, or even a reason for backing out. Certainly, my partner had a right to change their mind for whatever reason, But is it fair to expect some communication on this rather than just going to sleep with no explanation? Even the next day nothing was said to me at all. It hurt me to be treated like this. Sex was not the issue rather what led up to it with no communication. What is your thought on this? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, jenjen.270 +, writes (7 August 2010):
 I am probly not the best person in the world to give you advice on this subject, but it really struck my interest. I do not think that it is fair, not only would it piss me off that he was bragging in front of friends, but to ignore me later would really piss me off. I am having the same problems with my bf, he rarely touches me anymore, and when he does it is quick and he only takes care of himself. You really need to talk with him about this, dont be like me and get all mad, just try to talk to him, maybe he doesnt realize what he did.
A
female
reader, meshelle88 +, writes (7 August 2010):
 Blowing off plans with you daughter for sex is whats not fair here. Your child should come first, nomatter what. Sex is something ylou can have whenever, especially is you have a live in girlfriend. So, you were disappointed and hurt bc your gf blew you off? Thats just how your little girl felt when you chose sex over her. I think you are selfish sir. And if your daughter is small, you might just want to keep in mind that one day she is going to be grown, have friends, and might not want that walk, how will you feel then?
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (7 August 2010):
 Did your partner know about the plans you cancelled? If they didn't then that could explain how casually it is treated, and the no explanation. If your partner knew about the plans you had, and that you cancelled them, then it is really not nice at all to blow you off like that. You are right, it is not about the sex, it is about respect and how your time gets treated like it is worthless, and your plans the same.
It is sort of the same as when someone cancels a date on a restaurant.. its not the food that is the issue, but that you were cancelled on. And then to not even get an excuse or a reason.. or communication about it. Well that is just really bad behaviour.
Have a talk with your partner. Try and be calm about it so there will be no yelling or arguing involved. You will get your point across a lot better then.
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