A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:ive been with my husband for 12 years,latley during sex he gets soft.i give him the best blow jobs he has ever gotten in his life,i treat him like a king when it comes to foreplay and sex, so whats the deal.he always can go for a long time,but now he takes for evevr cumming,is it cause he likes to masterbate alot it doesnt matter if we just had sex a few min later i see him jerking off.so my question is why does he go soft and why cant he cum with me during sex?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2008): This must be very frustrating to you and yeah, I bet it hurts; it also creates certain feelings of "insecurity" and makes you wonder; what am I doing wrong/what more can or must I do;
You must relax; you by the sounds of it are doing a lot;
However:
There can be so many reasons for this;
It could be medical; Is he on any medication?
It could be psygological; (anxiety to perform, will make it worse)
It is impossible to give you an answer with so little information;
I suggest, you do not try and find the answer or SOLUTION here on this site;
BUT
I suggest:
1.Your husband must go for a full medical examination;
(with a clean bill of health, no blood pressure; no diabetics etc)
2. Ask your doctor to recommend a psygologist; ( if the psygologist is also happy"no problems")
3. Ask your doctor for a referal to a sex therapist.
I am sorry this seem like the long road; but unfortunately with situations like this it does not help to take a short cut; you do not want a short term solution;
My thoughts are with you; get the fire and the magic back in your marriage and don't delay; start today;
Keep us posted; remember we are here for you to talk 24/7;
Be strong and good luck;
Big hug and SMILE from me;
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