A
female
age
36-40,
*taunton5410
writes:My boyfriend and I have been together for 9 months. We live together and are usually very happy. Sometimes we do get in bad arguments though. Just like any couple. Almost every time we start yelling at eachother he says he wants to break up. Of course I start crying and I get really and I mean really emotional. And then he changes his mind and ends up staying with me. Why is he playing these back and fourth games with me? Please someone tell me what is going on with him. I have been so emotionally unstable because of this. I dont want to loose him but I dont want to be so weak and beg him to stay with me. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (4 July 2007):
 I'm with the ladies.
A
female
reader, YummyMummy  +, writes (4 July 2007):
 Talk to him about it. He can't pick go to drop you then because you cry pick you up again. That isn't fair. As you said all couples argue but not all couples break up everytime.
I agree with flowergirl- it does sound like control. Maybe he does it without knowing but him having this kind of emotional control over you isn't right and doesn't lead to a fair relationship.
I also agree with flowergirl that next time try calling his bluff. It may be hard especially if he walks away but then you'll know that he doesn't want to be there with you. He needs to know what he's doing is wrong even if he doesn't know it.
Don't beg him to stay with you. Make sure he wants to be with you because he loves you.
xxxxxxxxx
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A
female
reader, flower girl +, writes (3 July 2007):
 It sounds to me very much like control, you have a massive arguement and you are going to be right in some of them and so to make himself feel better he ends things with you, and just guessing i might be wrong but i bet when he does this and you get upset you end up apologising to keep hold of him.
If that is the case he now realises this so he will use the same tactic every time you argue now, because then he never has to admit to being wrong.
As hard as it may be maybe next time you have an arguement you should try calling his bluff and say ok thats it it's over.
It will be one way of finding out how he really feels about you.
Please stop begging him because it really is not an attractive quality in anyone.
Take care.xx.
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