A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:How to deal with paranoia in relationships?Me and my boyfriend have been together nearly 2 years and over the past year our paranoia over each other has started to tear us apart. We have both recognised it and want to work it out but just dont know how!I am always paranoid on him as he has lied to me in the past about lots of this.. firstly being on drugs. But now because i dont trust him he has started to reflect it back on me, saying i am only saying all this because i am covering my own tracks. and im not! i have never cheated or done anything to hurt him.We just need help to get over this paranoia but arent sure how to forget about it. Do we just ignore it?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2010): Are either of you drinking or using drugs, marijuana?
Frankly it may all be drug related cognitive problems.
If either of you are marijuana users, paranoia is a big part of that drug as it wears off in many people.
A
female
reader, No watered down advice here!  +, writes (21 December 2010):
 An addict is KNOWN to throw up the reverse psychology game on their partners. That’s what he is doing. He knows you have never cheated because your track record is clean. All they have to go on is our pass. Yours is not a cheating smudge on it, from what you’re telling us. So, therefore that’s his guilt speaking trying to pull you in with him. Don’t fall for it. Never IGNORE the FACT that he’s an addict! I’m a recovered addict. That knows I will always BE an addict. You need to attend groups that help people that have a family member that have addiction problems. Those groups are free. They’re in every community. (Check your area for: AA.) AA is everywhere, in every country. Ask for their family support groups. I wish you well.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2010): It is a trust issue. You can get into a downward spiral if you are not careful. Trust is hard to re-establish once it has gone. You can only talk this through together and see if you can start afresh. If not your relationship is flawed and it will be hard moving forward.
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