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Orgies? Other men with her? Other girls with me??

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Question - (24 February 2005) 2 Answers - (Newest, 24 February 2005)
A , anonymous writes:

I need to know if it is weird to think about your girlfriend with other guys. And to also know, if orgies are a good idea and what does it mean if i want my girlfriend to have sexual relations with other men ?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 February 2005):

Why dont you go and find yourself a gf who you are totally happy with.

If you wanna watch her have sex with someone else then you obviously dont have the feelings for her that you think you have. And the same if you want to have sex with other women.

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A female reader, Bev Conolly Australia +, writes (24 February 2005):

Bev Conolly agony auntWanting to watch your gf have sex with another man definitely isn't weird, it isn't even all that uncommon. It suggests that you find her attractive and that you're excited by the idea that other men will confirm your opinion of her desirability.

As long as she thinks it's fun, nobody's feelings are going to be hurt (including the hypothetical "other guy") and you both agree that it's no threat to your relationship with each other, I say 'Go for it'.

Same principles apply for you and other women, but since women tend to invest more intimacy in the sex act than men do, it's wise to be even more careful about the participating parties and even more careful with your gf's feelings, so she doesn't get jealous.

Are orgies a good idea? Hmmm. Well, anytime that you introduce a new person into the equation, it raises the complexities by about a power of ten. The more people, the more potential problems, both before and after the orgy.

For example: Are all the people in the orgy interested in the same kinds of sexual activity (ie: nobody's going to surprise the crowd by wanting to bring in the family dog, or turn up in a Girl Scout outfit, right)? Is everybody prepared to practice safe sex with everyone else, no matter what? Does anybody in the potential group have a case for anyone else in the group, and might therefore be trying to develop a relationship with that person? Do you know the parties you're going to invite and can you be sure that they're not going to go nuts inviting their weirdo friends? Etc etc.

From my perspective, orgies are more trouble than they're really worth.

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