A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello there aunts and uncles! I hope you are all well. I am looking for some opinions on BPD (borderline personality disorder). I have read some answers about some onviously deranged woman and some of the answers say it sounds like they have BPD. I have the illness myself and after years of councelling and CBT I am now in a very happy stable relationship and for the most part I am a very happy person I work full time and have a great social life and circle of friends. When I have discussed it with people they are convinced that people with the disorder cannot change (I do not tell people I have it as I do not want to be judged and my partner knows) I was just wondering if this is a common opinion with most people?I understand the venomocity against people like me especially those who don't seek help. I have myself been hospitalised on 17 occasions over two years and sectioned due to various episodes (I also have severe anxiety so take numerous anxiety attacks) and was a severe self harmer and do admit it was for attention but not from loved ones as I never told anyone I felt like a monster and isolated myself but I needed the comfort of the hospital and the feeling of being cared for and looked after. But I know people do it for the attention of their partners this was never a problem of mine and I have not done this in over 3 years after a few slip ups. Sorry for going off topic just some background on myself. I have sorted it out now and have weekly councelling sessions and I feel like a new person and have no depression at all I honetly could not be happier. But could I please have your opinions ? If you were my partners mother/father or brother or sister would you judge a person like myself as someone who could not change? When I see sites about BPD the common answer is to run away as fast as you can from someone who suffers it. Is this how most of you would feel? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Boonridge McPhalify +, writes (9 June 2012):
 it depends on the person as i work with a girl with BPD (and autism- very annoying and difficult to deal with) have 3 friends in the past and present with it and it does vary from person to person. the ones who were my friends were all drug heads (to a degree) who liked their sex but for the most part were fun people. would i date them- 1 of them yes, other 2 maybe, but be prepared for drama, random rows about nothing, cheating and other bullshit they create to alleviate their boredom.
basically take people as you find them BUT excessive attention seeking is off putting and you have to realize that if you desperately seek attention in a childish way that it may make others lose sympathy for you.
i myself definitely have a thread of BPD running through me but i also have the insight to grow on from it. it definitely affects my relationships with people.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 June 2012): I have friends that have bpd and while the episodes can be somewhat terrifying when they get violent, i just try to comfort them and get them help. Medication and counselling rly help. As well as support. I dont see it as a flaw, just an obsticle. I know i would want the same thing if i had bpd such as supportive friends and family. Not all people would run for it because of bpd, i wouldnt. Just becareful if you were to have kids because it is a genetic trait. Goodluck.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (9 June 2012):
 If I am honest personally no that is not how I would feel. At the end of the day this is an illness and yes you can change, off course you can with the right help people can change and learn how to deal with episodes. Off course you might never be fully cured but at the end of the day if your partner loves you, then she will also understand and accept that this is part of you as a person as well.
I know you are probably worried about other people judging you and I do not blame you because that is what some people do. However you should be proud of who you are and proud of how far you have come with this disorder. It is great to hear that you are happy and settled. Who cares what other people think? Have the confidence and belief in yourself and prove everyone who is negative about your improvement wrong.
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