A
female
age
30-35,
*isa ray
writes:Been with my girlfriend for the past 3 years everything was fine, own house cars full time jobs and random weekends away. Recently we have both been under pressure with trust issues. I did something I regretted in the first month or two of our relationship and now 2 and a half years later she brings it up. She's been lying about where she is going I've found texts from girls on her phone flirting with them and notes from work colleagues saying she wants to go out on a date with her even tho she is straight and got a boyfriend. Her mates boyfriend knows non of this of course. One minute she's all for me the next I get the cold shoulder. We've been talking about starting a family and her latest excuse was I've been acting weird because I want to ask you to marry me. I'm at a loose end and don't know what to do anymore.
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female
reader, Lisa ray +, writes (8 February 2015):
Lisa ray is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNoah I'm in hospital due to family stress more than anything. Were talking tomorrow to try work things out .we live apart I've said I'm looking for my own place as I live with parents again. Want my independence back
A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (8 February 2015):
 If the reason YOU are in the hospital is due to issues with her, you really should consider that THIS is not a healthy relationship.
If I were you, I'd focus on myself for a while, let her do her thing. If you two live together, start by finding your own place (or ask her to move out if the place is yours) split your assets and FULLY focus on your health/mental health.
She sounds petty and vengeful. Can you imagine raising children with her, honestly?
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A
female
reader, Lisa ray +, writes (8 February 2015):
Lisa ray is verified as being by the original poster of the questionYes basically that. Except she already had "revenge" by sleeping with some one else already. She won't answer me I'm currently in a hospital bed having an anxiety attack because of it and apparently I'm attention seeking. She said I love you and I'll see you later yesterday I'm still waiting :/
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (8 February 2015):
So she is using you mistake from the past to justify considering cheating with this co-worker?
Which means, she hasn't forgiven you for your past transgressions.
YOU two need to sit down and talk this though. WHY is she thinking it's OK for her to do these things when it WASN'T OK for you in the past? Does she thing she has a "freebie" pass to cheat because YOU in the past cheated?
The asking to marry you seems random, specially of she is flirting and cheating (emotionally at least) with a co-worker.
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