A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have a boyfriend...but um, this guy "Drew" has fallen hard for me. Driving down to just see me as much as possible when he's broke and forced to sleep in his car, I've never asked him to, he claims hes here to see my city but then beeegs to hang out. He's sweet, funny. Before I was involved, I wished I could fall for him. But, theres no attraction at all for me and I just can't see it. I tried to be mean, told him it couldn't be and he suffered a major anxiety attack. When I got a bf, I was scared to tell him for fear of what would happen. He told me he loved me again today via txt after I finally relented to hang with him (he cried)...help me please...what can I do? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you all, especially you SeeingStars. I felt sooo bad thinking he was creepy, maybe dangerous etc. but I'm glad someone else saw it! But yeah, I've told him oh so many times I don't like/want him like that-Only to find out he's checked into a psychiatric office, suffering from a nervous breakdown. His dad called me once begging me to please, please help him cause this guy was depressed etc etc and I couldn't understand why-we never dated. I met him through friends! That's why I hesitated on being mean. I'm going to take everyone's advice and just stand firm. THANK YOU!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2010): I would stay far away from this guy. He is being manipulative, crying and making you feel bad so you will hang out with him. That is really not a good sign! And randomly driving to see you and sleeping in his car is a bit creepy in my opinion, and way too much.
I know it might be hard, but I think you need to be firm and refuse to spend time with him. If he tries to talk to you, tell him firmly and clearly that you are NOT interested. Don't get into a conversation or discussion with him. Just tell him and leave. I know this might sound really harsh, but I don't think he will get the message otherwise, and he will continue to pester you.
Also, you have a boyfriend, so this might cause problems there too. Don't allow yourself to be pressured into situations you do not wish to be in. Be clear with this guy, and stand firm. If he really won't leave you alone though, or if it gets any worse, I would also consider calling the police and telling them what is going on. Just be careful with this guy.
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A
female
reader, Gabrielle Stoker +, writes (16 August 2010):
 Be firm but kind and tell him you're not romantically interested in him and that you will no longer communicate with him if he continues to expect similar feelings from your side. If he doesn't desist, act on the threat and cut him off. Sometimes it's really the only way.
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