A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Hi,Right now there is a girl at my high school who is bullying me and another girl. She is saying mean things about us to other people and making it seem like we are bad people when really we don't want anything to do with her or the situation and just want her to stop. Bad thing is she won't she is the type of girl who loves drama and really we don't. It's our senior year and we already have let go of the situation but she keeps saying ignorant things and it comes back to us in very inconvenient ways. All drama is of course inconvenient but, it's just we feel like it's behind us and we can just work on our school work and enjoy what we have before college she just throws all of this stuff out at people about us. We aren't talking about it to anyone only each other. This is causing extreme emotional distress to the point where we both feel sick. I threw up and she is very sick. Our anxiety is through the roof and we don't know how long we will be able to deal with this because it's affecting our school and personal lives. Any advice? Taking legal action is something that I would consider doing with the other girl involved. I have texts from her and she has texts from her and we have people who have witnessed this. what to do?
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female
reader, frogysocute +, writes (18 December 2010):
Hi,
Go to the girl and tell her how you feel about her being mean and hateful to you! I know most advice you are probaly getting from adults is ignore her but that does not always work. If she comes up to you and starts saying mean things to you say have a nice day and then walk away. If the does not work then every time you see her close by go away where you can not see her! One of these tips should work! good luck!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 October 2010): hii...first off, i just want to say that i'm soo sorry that you and your friend are going through this. i was bullied in the same way during my sophomore year in high school, and i remember how hurtful it was. there is no reason for you girls to have to put up with this other girl (who is probably just an insecure little child on the inside). you don't deserve for someone to make you feel sick the way that you described. i'm not sure what legal action could be taken against this girl under the circumstances, but i definitely know that there is probably something that school authorities (principal, counselor, etc.) can do about it. my advice to you is to tell your parents (or, if you don't feel like you can talk to them about it, find another adult that you trust) and have them go to the principal or counselor or whoever is in charge at your school. if your case is anything like mine, the school authority figure will then have a long conversation with the bully which will result in her (finally) letting you live your life in peace.i realize that nobody wants to be a snitch (because believe me, i didn't want to tell anyone when this was happening to me), but ultimately, telling someone about this is the best thing that you can do. you and your friend deserve better for your senior year. ")good luck, and God bless,~sarsar~
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (11 October 2010):
Contact school authorities and talk to your parents. School authorities will probably like this to not get to the police, but you can actually report her for harassment if you have the texts and can proove it. However your parents will be more fit to help you if you choose to go that route.
But, involve your parents or other adults in this (and by adults here I mean not someone 3 years older than you, but someone who has the knowledge on how to deal with this). Take advantage of the people around you and in your family, if you don't have the solution, they will. And they will help you. Don't be afraid to speak up.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (11 October 2010):
Take it to your parents and the school authorities, if it is occurring on school property during school hours. Even if just a part of it is during the school day, take it to the school counselor.
Bullying succeeds as long as the bullied acquiese and don't tell anyone. That's when the bully wins. So if this girl is to be stopped, the bullying has to be reported.
Especially as you are feeling physically ill, this is a sign that things are beyond your control. Take it to the parents and the teachers, counselors or principal who will be able to help you.
Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2010): It is my understanding that unless there is actual criminal activity involved you really cant do anything legaly. Bugging someone and creating drama isnt illigal. Once however it goes to harrassment, now it is. Harrassment needs to be proved though. You need to log dates/times of the incidents.. keep texts and emails. Once there is alot of it, then you have a case.However, she is in High School, so are you. Laws are different for people under 18, the legal system understands that immaturity has alot to do with it.Now if she starts pushing/shoving/throwing things .. these are criminal activities and age isnt a factor to the law, but the sentancing would be. But again, you both go to the same high school, and usualy where harrasment is involved, the outcome is no more contact, obviously this is impossible when at school.I am not a lawyer or legal aide. If you want true legal assistance, you can call your local court house, or city hall. They will at least get you in the right direction of whom you would want to talk to.Also, the more people this person picks on, the better your case ... but really, in the end what will a judge say. He will probably look at it as though its immaturity, you only have 1 year of school left, suck it up. Unless of course like I said, it does cross over to the criminal end.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (11 October 2010):
If you have offensive texts, then you can probably take legal advice. I'd recommend talking to a teacher or something first, as legal advice is expensive. But I'd imagine you could get a restraining order or something.
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