A
female
age
41-50,
*LB1964
writes:I have just started dating a man who is a lot older than I am (20 years). He has told me that he has a "golden shower" fetish. I'm okay with it, don't understand it, but ok with it. The only thing is now it seems that's the only thing he wants to talk about. How do I let him know that I want to talk about other sexual options while still supporting his fetish? Is it okay to not always pee on him during sex? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2010): I am a 32 year old man, and I think your bf is sorta suffering some mental issues. He doesn't sound normal to me, but I can be totally wrong. Want a sincere advice? Don't do anything you are not comfortable with, and keep a wary eye on the various aspects of the relationship.
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (11 August 2010):
 Personally I could not be OK with it. I just find it nasty, but each to their own I guess.
If you don't want to do something sexually you TELL him. TELL him what turns YOU on, what YOU want in the bedroom, sex is a two way street. Having a fantasy/fetish is all well and good, but it doesn't mean it has to be fulfilled all the time or even at all.
Being matched sexually makes such a difference :)
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2010): Tell him you have desires too, and to not always have to pee is one of them! Surely if you save it for now and then he will like it more anyway.
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite  +, writes (10 August 2010):
 ok golden shower basically mean they either want you to pee on them or them to pee on you! just because its his fetish doesnt mean you have to accept it! also if you do it is on your terms! just because he likes it doesnt mean you have to do it all the time if you dont like it like he does! my ex liked that sort of thing but really makes me cringe so it was never something we did! and if your ok to pee on him or him to pee on you im sure theirs not much you cant talk about! since you are doing something for him then tell him its his turn to pay back the favour and do something for you and talk about the things you enjoy or would like to try. hope this helps good luck aphex
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