A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am dating a guy who is a strong Christian believer. We know each other from work and have been hanging out for a few months now. Often we have quality time together but lately he has been preaching to me, on almost every meeting. I have hinted and occasionally informed him that religion does not interest me at all but he continues. He keeps going on at me, and spent his extra cash on buying me a Bible lately, instead of a game he has always wanted. I accept his beliefs but for the preaching, I cannot decide whether to remain friends with him or move on and forget about him entirely? Please help.
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male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (21 March 2010):
 This isn't going to work, but it's not because he's a Christian or not. This is not about religion. It won't work because it has to be his way or no way. He doesn't seem to get that you don't share his beliefs. Maybe it is because you haven't done the right thing, which would be telling him up front. The man is not a mind reader.
Speak your mind to him, and that way you will know where you stand with him.
Unfortunately, some religions demand that their faithful don't marry out. Maybe his trying to convert you is his way to keep you. The bad thing is, if he gets this, you will always have to say yes to whatever he thinks. You know him better: you be the judge.
A
male
reader, Danielepew +, writes (21 March 2010):
This isn't going to work, but it's not because he's a Christian or not. This is not about religion. It won't work because it has to be his way or no way. He doesn't seem to get that you don't share his beliefs. Maybe it is because you haven't done the right thing, which would be telling him up front. The man is not a mind reader.
Speak your mind to him, and that way you will know where you stand with him.
Unfortunately, some religions demand that their faithful don't marry out. Maybe his trying to convert you is his way to keep you. The bad thing is, if he gets this, you will always have to say yes to whatever he thinks. You know him better: you be the judge.
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A
female
reader, MonksDaBomb  +, writes (21 March 2010):
 You can't hint at this type of stuff - it will just go over his head. You need to sit him down and tell him how it makes you feel. Just tell him to tone it down. There is nothing wrong with Christians and non-Christians dating, as long as BOTH parties accept the other's beliefs. People can't force others their religion and they just need to accept this fact. Tell your guy this. Chances are, he'll stop publicly preach you but just secretly pray for you instead, which is totally fine.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (21 March 2010):
 Don't hint to him. You need to be more forceful to show your dislike for this issue.
You need to tell him direct and straight that you find his preaching uncomfortable and you do not like it.
If he respects you , he will stop. Some Christians are like loose cannon . They are on fire for the Lord and go all out to evangelize and convert all their friends.
This is not preaching but religious abuse or harassment.
Reading the Bible from a non Christian and a Christian perspective is different.
You may read and understand those English meanings but what God wants to reveal to you is hidden except if you have the spiritual eyes of God or the Holy Spirit in you.
When you become a born again Christian , your spiritual eyes will be opened and the Holy Spirit comes and reside in you.
Without the Holy Spirit, you will not be able see or understand what is revealed in the Bible.
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A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (21 March 2010):
 Atheist here.. he won't be able to stop... as you noticed our more religious aunts want to help you, but they also suggest that you at least try their church and their bible stuff.
It's part of their beliefs, they can't stop, they need to share the good news with you.If it's driving you crazy now, it will always drive you crazy unless you give in and start doing the Christian thing.
Friends as Christians are fine, but difficult if your partners or dating, and difficult if you haven't made up your mind to be rude and tell them as forcefully as you can, you heard the good news and you still aint interested.
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female
reader, SirenaBlusera +, writes (21 March 2010):
 I don't understand why a devout Christian would date a non-Christian?
I can understand why he wants to convert you and his heart really is in the right place. It sounds like he cares about you.
I don't mean to offend you, but could you go to church with him just once and see how you feel about it? You don't have to convert. You don't mention what beliefs you have, exactly, but I'm guessing you're atheist or agnostic. We have freedom of religion, that's the nice thing about Britain and many other countries. But... it couldn't hurt to go with him to church just once.
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 March 2010): Be frank about it and tell him you don't want to hear a thing about religion or his beliefs, and that you'll read the Bible he bought you, but only when you want to, and you don't ever want to talk about it. If he suggests going to church and you don't want to, tell him you're never going. If you give an inch for a preacher, they'll persist until they figure they've sculpted you into what they are satisfied with. Reading the Bible is sufficient enough for someone who doesn't otherwise believe in Christianity. You can gather most of the wisdom and guidance yourself out of just a well written version of the Bible, such as the King James version or a Guidian version. If you want to understand the Bible's wordings really well, just buy a modern text version, where the English is modern and clear. Personally, I find the old versions the best, since they haven't been altered another time, and you can translate various meanings out of just a single line in it, which is how I feel it was meant to teach us, whereas the modern version translates what it feels the old English version of that same type of Bible meant already, so you end up getting one piece of wisdom out of a sentence that might have you translate various possibilities for yourself. Don't feel you even have to read a Bible, though, as there should never be any pressure to learn from it, but being a Christian myself, and as much of a sinner I must be at the same time, I've found church to be the first to teach things wrong in many ways, and so if you feel like I do, you don't want anyone preaching to you, knowing that you could just get that same preaching, but alot more accurately out of the Bible. I find the Bible loaded with yes, 'miraculous teachings', but I don't like hearing a mere sinner who will usually mistranslate most of the Bible, preaching to me, especially everyday, and I will tell them to shove it, because if they are Christian, they know they shouldn't let the Word escape their mouth in attempts to exalt themselves and in judging that you're not walking a straight path. If he can't love you for who you are, mistakes and all, without pushing his beliefs on you everyday, don't get too close because he'll always judge you through preaching. If you are ever going through rough moments in life, open the Bible, though, and you'll be surprised how much it comforts you and guides you when you can't find accuracy anywhere else. Otherwise, it's your choice how much you want to read it. In that sense, him giving you a Bible is one of the greatest gifts he or anyone could have given you, but don't take chronic preaching, or you'll just condone what they shouldn't be doing, and it makes other Christians look bad. There's a time and a place for everything, but he shouldn't be doing that.
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female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (21 March 2010):
 You have told him you are not interested in his religion but he persists! He isnt listening to you, he doesnt care about your opinions or wishes, he just wants to convert you to his church.
If you are as strong in your disbeliefs (for want of a better word) as he is in his beliefs, this relationship is not going to go anywhere except down the gurgler.
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (21 March 2010):
 Forget about him. Before you let him go, tell him there are 9 Jesuses at different historical periods that shared the same fate: Horus, Attis, Krishna, Dionysus, Mithra, Christ, I forgot the other ones. They all supposedly born on Dec 25, Born of a Virgin, Star in the East, Adorned by 3 Kings, Teacher at 12, Baptized Ministry at 30, 12 Disciples, Performed Miracales, Lamb of God, Crucified, Died 3 days, resurrected. The bible is as much history, poetry, symbolism as the above seems like blasphemy for a lot of people.Sounds all like paganistic ritual performed over and over again. Most Christians have no idea about religion.
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