A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hi, alright so I recently just got a boyfriend, it's been four days that we've been dating. I've liked this boy...we'll call him Daniel, for about 2 months. On Sunday, we had a science project to work on, so I went to his house.(This was before we decided to date.)We had to work on the project in his room because his parents were using the table in the dining room for making dinner. So I was slightly nervous at the fact that we would be alone for quite a while in his room. Eventually I relaxed and got comfortable. So we focused on doing the project and we got quite a bit done and decided to take a break about 2 hours into it. So we looked at our grade nine yearbook and talked about people we knew, hated, etc. Soon after I saw a hat on his bed post and I decided to take it, and wear it. He got all possessive and wanted it back (what is it with guys and their snap backs/fitted's?) I didn't want to give it because it was fun seeing him freak out so I dived onto his bed and layed on my stomach hiding the hat underneath me. He comes onto me and starts tickling me and pokes my sides (I'm ticklish sadly) So eventually he got it back and hid it. I was still laying on his bed and then he climbed on his bed too and layed behind me and wrapped his arms around me. We were like that for a good 10 minutes... maybe even more. Then after we had to get back to work, so we were 3/4 of the way done, and his family insisted on me staying and eating with them so I did, then we went back upstairs to do the final touches on the project, we got stuck on one of the tasks so we decided to take a little break because we were getting frustrated. So I layed on his bed again and the same thing happened again, he joined me and wrapped his arms around me. Soon after I was getting annoyed because I thought it was pretty clear that he liked me considering he was doing this with me. After he let go and got back to work because he didn't want one of his parents to catch us. So he was sitting on his computer chair and I got off the bed and walked up behind him and covered his eyes with my hands and he removed them and brought my hands to his chest and he started to rub/caress my arm and I rested my chin on the top of his head. Things were very quiet, it was sorta intense... So we stayed like that for what felt like YEARS! Then out of nowhere he decided to be bold and gets up, moves his chair, and kisses me. At first I was shocked, because I didn't exactly expect something like that from him. But eventually I gave in and kissed him back, and we ended up making out for about 10 minutes and there was some tongue here and there. And after the kiss, we talked about it and that's when we decided to give us a try. Soon after I called my father to pick me up. So when I looked out of "Daniel's" window I saw him and started putting my sweater on and got my stuff and before we headed downstairs I turned to him and hugged him, and we made out again this time just for about 5 minutes not even. And he brought me to the door, told me goodnight, and said he would see me tomorrow... Now here is where I get really confused. We've been dating for four days, all of our friends know about our relationship. He won't kiss me... I don't know why. The only affection I get from him is him hugging me when we depart to go to different classes or when he walked me home, the closest I ever gotten was kissing him on the cheek or on a small peck on his neck. Nothing else. I don't understand why. I mean he didn't have a problem showing his affection for me on Sunday in his room, so what's the difference now? Do I kiss terribly, does he not like me as much as I thought, or does he just simply not like Public displays of affection... Either way, it's making me feel a little ashamed and confused. What do you think is his problem? Because I sure don't know. And I am WAY too shy to ask him why he won't kiss me or just demand him to kiss me... Please help me... Thank you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2011): What is wrong with enjoying the hugs? Because fast forward 20 years and you will be another woman complaining about how your Man doesn't hold you enough.And there is NOTHING WRONG with taking things slow. Some people need time to feel comfortable and get used to the idea of kissing someone.Jeesh. You aren't married so why expect him to be some Romeo who just magically knows what you want- AS IF- doesnt change by the way. I still have to ask for the things I want from the Men I date.You could be in the room of some boy who has 8 arms and you have to fend him off and he wont stop and respect your boundaries.Why cant you just be happy you are 13-15 years old and there is no rush for a kiss or a hug, or a cop a feelie or anthing else other than having a crush on someone and enjoying the innocence and kindness, gentleness of a boy who respects you so much, he is happy holding you and kissing you when he feels comfortable to do so?I think you are reading too much into the situation. Just enjoy the coast of the relationship. The Pace. Don't push or force. You and Him together- this is your norm.Sometimes its fun to be left wondering when you will be kissed again.Ever thought to tell him you think he kissed you perfectly?;)
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (24 November 2011):
 well it sounds like he does like you or else he never would have asked you out in the first place. My guess would be that he just does not like a public display of affection. However he did make the first move by kissing you first, so maybe he is waiting to see if you make the next move. If you do not want to talk to him about it well then you should try and kiss him and see how he reacts. A relationship works both ways it should not just be about him trying to kiss you but vice versa as well. He might be sitting right now thinking the same as you are, wondering why you never try and kiss him. So if you don't want to talk to him about it, well then you are going to need to take the lead and see how it goes.
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