A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I want to make this short because I have final exams to study for. In June of 2008, my high school closed down. I September I transfered to another school. I was in love with my history teacher, and to this day I still am. I plan on inviting him to my graduation, and if he does come, should I confess my feelings for him? I don't have any idea as to what I should do. He's not my teacher, and he hasn't been my teacher for 11 months. I'm 18, an adult. The question is Should I tell him how I feel? What do you think?This teacher and I were extremely close. We were almost like best friends. Over the years, since my freshman year we sort of flirted on and off. The problem is he's 46, married, and has a one year old son. Another problem is that I'm in a relationship. But we're currently taking a break from each other. We've been dating for two months, but I don't know if I'll ever be able to love him because I'm still very much in love with my ex-teacher. The boy I'm dating has no idea about this teacher. I thought that he would find it weird. My boyfriend is confused too, he says we've lost the connection we had when we first started dating. I guess it's because I still have feelings for my ex-teacher. Please help. I'm confused.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2009): Yeah and if i were you, i would invite his while family. Not just him and it's ok if he ends up bringing them, but invite them all upfront. You don't want to cause any problem between he and his wife over why this girl wants you at her graduation but not us.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI'm sorry, I guess I did get a little out of my head there. You guys are right. I mean I really do respect that he's married. The only thing I ever wanted was for him to be happy and he is. Loving someone means putting someone else before yourself. I've been putting him first for as long as I've known him. Lord knows I would never be able to tell him how I really feel. Truthfully I'm chicken shit. But I still want to invite him to my graduation because it'd mean a lot to me if he came. And if he does bring his wife and son along that's ok.
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A
male
reader, Ted-ster +, writes (15 May 2009):
You lost your connection with your BF because you have been having an emotional affair (not a physical one) with your teacher; concentrating on this older man instead of your BF. Do not invite your teacher to your graduation party, but, if you must, do not utter a word about your infactuation. I hope you have the class and good taste to invite his wife, and son, if he's young, too, if you feel you have to invite him. Save the history teacher for a good reference, unless you want to embarrass yourself and lose a good reference at the same time. Also, other teachers will likely find out. Not a good plan to tell him. Also, there's nothing wrong with breaking up with BF if he doesn't interest you, but you should reevaluate the situation in light of my wisdom.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2009): You should be a respectable, lady-like young woman and respect the marriage that this man is in and his child. You simply cannot always have what you want, that's life and you have to deal with it. Something else you should do is let your boyfriend go. Let him move on so that he can be in a relationship that is fair to him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2009): Every girl was some time or the other attracted to someone alot older that themself but its just a phrase don't worry about it, and move on. Cause when you think about it he wouldn't be able to for fill your needs. It's just a feeling and everyone has those, some more than others depending on your age. Look instead for a guy who is intelligent and certainly doesn't behave like a little boy. He should be close to your age that way you can fulfil each other needs and grow old together. not die out 40 years before you!
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