A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Throughout this year my stance on dating has changed. I used to think that I would be the type of guy to wait until I was in a real relationship to have anything to do with sex. But after my 21st birthday my thoughts about dating in general have changed. I can now see myself start to experiment with sex, I haven't had a chance to do anything with anyone, and I do attract a lot of women(Not to be conceited) with many of them wanting to be my firsts.Is it normal for me to be okay with wanting to experiment with sex? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (11 December 2011):
 Blowjobs are sex. Define sex to me and yourself. Why were you strongly against kissing etc. a year ago? Isn't kissing a part of getting into a relationship with a girl, and as such a necessary step? Or do you want to be in a relationship before you touch a girl (Im just talking any random touch here such as holding hands even) or kiss her? I don't quite understand your predicament. You said you don't have chances to do things, and by "things" you don't mean "get into a relationship", but "sex"? How about you use these multiple chances you've got at getting a relationship and get into a relationship? Whats the problem there? It's what you want after all, so why aren't you doing it?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionChigirl-I mean like haven't been in a room alone with a girl such as having a opportune time to do anything such as kiss, touch ,etc...I was strongly against even thinking about doing such things a year ago but now I find it odd that ive changed in my perspective. I of course would still prefer to be in a relationship until I have sex. Its the other things such as like blow jobs, and things of that nature im talking about. Sorry for the lack of clarification.
bluecow-Yes Safety and responsibility is what I preach to all my friends that are currently sexually active.
jmr1993-If I would even to be a real relationship its gonna be a long while. Its hard for me to be tied down hence the question should I do something now or wait until years later.
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (10 December 2011):
How does this not match up: 1. I haven't had a chance to do anything with anyone, and 2. I do attract a lot of women?
Why can't you date one of these willing women you attract, build up something of a relationship, and then experiment? I'm saying you don't need to wait until marriage, but you don't need to sleep around either. There's a good middle section there where you enter a relationship with someone who is nice and then experiment. Don't just jump in bed with someone only interested in taking your V-card and brag about it... Not when you have the opportunity to enter a relationship and then experiment with the person you are in a relationship with.
It's normal to want to experiment with sex, but I'm not sure what you are asking here. Are you asking if it's normal to want to sleep around and be promiscuous? At your age, yes, quite normal. But do many regret sleeping around? Yes indeed they do, and before you know it someone gets knocked up.
In any case, remember this:
No glove no love.
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A
female
reader, bluecow  +, writes (10 December 2011):
 Absolutely 100% normalSex is more fulfilling in a loving relationship, but that doesnt mean that consensual one nighters arent fun too.The simple rules are:BE SAFE - contraception and protection from STI'sBE HONEST - do not lie your way into a ladies pants. If all you want is a casual one nighter, then tell her so, If you want a relationship then tell her too!BE FAITHFUL - if in any sort of exclusive relationship, and let them know if you are sleeping with others.BE HEALTHY - if you are going to engage in casual sex, get regular sexual health checkups to make sure you havent caught something nastyBE RESPONSIBLE - no contraception is 100%, so be prepared to accept the consequenses if things dont go to plan.BE SENSITIVE - if there is something you want to try, then suggest it, but dont be suprised or angry if your partner isnt keen.HAVE FUN - i dont think this one needs any explanation!Good luck x
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A
female
reader, bluecow +, writes (10 December 2011):
absoloutly 100% normalSex is more fulfilling in a loving relationship, but that doesnt mean that consensual one nighters arent fun too.The simple rules are:BE SAFE -
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A
female
reader, jmr1993 +, writes (10 December 2011):
 Of course it is. Sex is a natural part of life and honestly, experimenting is alright. I understand the wanting to wait to be in a serious relationship, but the flip side to that is, what happens if you end up in this serious relationship and later on you start to think about the "what ifs" and it could ruin a relationship later. It's up to you, but it is completely ok to want to actually experiment and try it. And you never know, doing something different may lead you to that serious relationship.
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (10 December 2011):
 What have you been eating for breakfast these last 21 years?????? OF course a young man of 21 wants to experiment with s*x!!!!
P.S. Imagine if you were to wait until you were 42.... THEN, you would have to look back and say to yourself, "Da*n, I've wasted 1/2 my life!!!!!"
Good luck....
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