Nothing happened but my g/f doesn't trust me!

A male age 30-35, anonymous writes:

I was single 6 months before going to college and decided I wasn't going to date anyone because it would be a waste of my time and I wasn't interested in anyone...then I met this girl who said she was probably going to the same college I was (the only girl I know of that was)... In the end we had a really intense close relationship and things went perfectly when we were together and perfect when we are together...i mean honestly we had fights but nothing serious and we communicated really well...I love her and everything about her.... She is honestly exaclty what I want in a woman...soon after we started dating she decided that a school far away from mine would be the best decision because it had everything she wanted (other than being with me obviously)... I understand because that is the best for her.... So she went off to school and we set ground rules of what we wouldn't do...(no drinking,no dancing with other people, etc)... She gets to school and we end up in a couple fights because she was often really busy and didn't get a lot of time talking like we use to get....things get better and then I go to school... I am out obpn this insane schedule for orientation and so we don't talk the first couple nights like we usually do on video chat because of all the things we had going on... There was a dance one night and I figured I should go even though I hate dances and can't dance... I go with 5 guys and 2 girls....after getting there it is only me and this one girl talking... I decide I'm going to leave and I wanted to walk around campus and meet people and she decides to come with me (one of the rules is no alone time with someone of the opposite sex).... Idk what to do because I don't know how to just leave someone and tell her I don't wanna talk to her because my girlfriend says no and I feel it's slightly unhealthy if she doesn't even trust me enough to talk and walk somewhere with someone.... I try to find someone else to join us so I won't break a rule but I'm shy and I can't really find anyone....eventually we find a group of people then I leave after but we walked around for 30 minutes - an hour just her and I looking for people and talking.... I feel fucking terrible that I didn't say or do anything and I'm an open and honest guy and I will never lie to her because I love her and care about her... So I decide to tell her... She gets insanely upset... The girl I went with had a boyfriend and wasn't interested in me and we actually talked about our relationships and how we were trying long distance...we talked about how much we cared about our significant others....but my girlfriend didn't care a and wanted to break up and she said she can't trust me and that her family hates me now because she told them what happened.... I didn't do anything bad at all with the girl at all....but I did break a rule which makes me feel horrible like I wanna just cry all night , I just didn't know what to do in that situation.... I hate how she says she can't trust me now and how her parents hate me and how she wanted to break up...I never wanted a long distance relationship before I met her.... I'm really also upset because things that happened in the past between me and her that were previously resolved ... A guy asked her to dance and I am a jealous boyfriend and I told her she can't.... She later told me that the same guy asked her to go bowling just him and her alone and that she wanted to go until I got upset about the dancing... She didn't tell me about this until after I got upset about the dancing....later I find out that she use to have a huge crush on him in the past... I think we both fucked up big time....I mean hers was with a guy she use to like... Mine I broke a rule ....it's just a lot and I want to say we both fucked up...she is convinced that I am the fuck up and she did nothing wrong and everything is my fault .... I just wanna move on and say we are equal and both fucked up and be even and move on and work on fixing everything but it's hard when she is 10 hours away....I think that she will never trust me again and I hate how she thinks her mistakes aren't as bad as mine...idk I still trust her but she can't trust me and that hurts....should I try things? Should I say something? Should I give up? Is it worth it? Am I a terrible horrible person?

View related questions: crush, jealous, long distance, move on, shy

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465  +, writes (26 August 2011):

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