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female
age
30-35,
*oxotinytearsxoxo
writes: Hi! Help! i ve had a baby recently-it was very much a shock as i never found out til i was 28 weeks gone! but the question is, i slept with my boyfriend on the last day of my period,(unprotected) and the day after we broke up,but 3 weeks later i stupidly had unprotected sex with someone else. i took the morning after pill ASAP which was 11 hours later. so is my ex boyfriend the father or the other guy?its all bit confusing as i found out i was pregnant so late!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 February 2007): I'm in a similar situation myself. I'm 29 years old. My boyfriend of 6 years and I had a difficult summer, we were not engaged at the time, we were not living together. Pretty much in a nut shell we were just going through the motions and I was very unsure of where we were going as a couple;we were taking steps back rather than forward. I took a date with a man 8 yrs younger than me; under the advice of friends and family (they suggested that I go on the date, and see how I feel), well in a moment of weakness the dated ended up with us in bed and a broken condom. (June)
This past Aug I found out that I was pregnant (12 weeks) I was overjoyed. I told my boyfriend, and at that time things were going much better for us and we were talking about what we both wanted and that was to be man and wife.
On Oct 28th he proposed to me and I accepted. Life was great! The young man that I had a date with this past summer called me just to say hello and I told him the new news about being engaged and pregnant...he asked how far along I was and I told him. He did question if the child could be his due to the time line; and I told him that I was not 100% sure anything was possible that I had been with both of them that month. He also said that if it is his he would like to be a part of his childs life.
Now sets in the guilt.
I love my boyfriend (I don't know what else to call him right now, so this will do. We are seperated at this time)
This past January 26th I told my boyfriend the entire truth of taking a date this summer, the moment of weakness, and that I was not sure who the father could be. I want to be his wife and start a life with him with no lies, and no secrets. The news was devistating for him. However; I could not go on keeping this secret from him, not knowing who the father is and making him think that it could be his and then to find out a year or more down the road that he may not be the father of this child with whom he has bonded with and known as his own. (I watch TV and see how it can break a man, when the truth comes out after the birth; I loved him enough to tell him the truth before I caused anymore hurt, and before we took a vow infront of God).
I'm due March 12th; him and I are trying to work through things. He wants to be with me; but has expressed concern about he does not know how to deal with the fact that this child may not be his...that he wants to be there for the delivery, but he is just so torn on how to feel; he loves me more than life and wants me, but now I am a package deal..a package that may not be his.
My question to you is...is it possible to be a father to another mans child? My daughter will not know any other life than the one that I give her, in my head I would love to see me and him living as man and wife raising this child, and her knowing her biological father as well (I can not, and will not deny a father there child). So; I guess I just wonder what others think about this...and if its possible to have a life with two fathers...the father that raises her and bioligal father whom she also knows both from birth.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 February 2007): You'll need to dna test, I have just found out, 8 years late. That my partner is not my child's father. I found out yesterday in fact. I took the scan dates as way of determing. Like you, we had split but I had been with someone else a while and got back together three weeks later. My scan was three weeks out of date at 10 weeks.
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A
female
reader, xoxotinytearsxoxo +, writes (5 January 2007):
xoxotinytearsxoxo is verified as being by the original poster of the questioni was 19 when i found i was pregnant and im just 21 now.with my fertility i actuallyhave Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome. so im not that fertile- atleast i shouldnt of been!as for the 3weeks later guy- its not something i make a habit out of, im just very much hoping its my ex who is the father! im just thinking that i mustve been in the very early stages of pregnancy when i had the morning after pill...
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A
female
reader, Jovial  +, writes (5 January 2007):
 eish this is the price we pay for unprotected sex but anyway i think the solution here is to figure out a way to get your hands on anything that u can use to obtain dna match without them finding out, u can target the one you are close to or who is accessible no questions asked. i do think the 3wks later is the father but depending on your fertility u might have conceived during that last day bcos i know someone who conceived in the middle of her period and the explanation was that she is too fertile.
good luck
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