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female
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*untie dearie
writes: I have been in a relationship for about five years now. My boyfriend only decided to break it to me yesterday that not only did he cheat on me about three years ago, he also managed to get the girl pregnant so now he has a two year old son. My problem is do I stay with him, forgive all and accept his son or just walk away? He is good to me and I know he loves me but can I trust him? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, lisa_01  +, writes (16 February 2006):
 well first off i just have to point out that if you do forgive him and continue on with this relationship its going to be a diffcult process for you, for one you just cant get over and forgive someone for cheating it might take months even years before you can recover, their is going to be alot of heartach and tears for you, this will take alot out of you, do you really want to go through all of this over something he did wrong in the first place? and what makes this even worse is that if he has a relationship with this child that child will be a never ending reminder of his infidelity, and if the child is part of his life then so will the mother, and have you asked yourself this are you going to be able to trust him around her? who says that he wont sleep with her again?. This guy lied to you for 2 years about this, he probably only told you because he knew that in the end he would get caught out because of the child, but whta if their was no child he probably would have just gone on keeping it a secret,you really need to site down and think about all this and ask yourself all these questions, but to be totally honest with you, just walk away you can do better then that, i tell you what if i found out my man did that to me i would not even have to second guess myself id be out of there so fast, you are always going to doubt his love for you and its not fair that you should have to feel that way, get out now before he hurts you anymore.
A
female
reader, missmeliss0627 +, writes (15 February 2006):
Wow, thats a tough one! was it a one time thing 3 years ago? Or has there been other women? Has he been involved with his son for these past 2 years? You might want to rethink this relationship, if he has been secretly seeing his son for 2 years that means he's always lying to you. if he hasn't he's a dead beat dad, and that could be your child he does that to later in life. Chances are you'll never fully get over his cheating and lies and everytime he walks out the door, you'll drive yourself nuts wondering what he's doing and where he's going. he may be good to you but he wasn't good to you when he cheated and he wasn't good to you when he lied to you for 3 years. I really hope you could get over it if he's changed but don't waste you time on a liar and a cheat. good luck
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