A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been with my boyfriend for about a year now and he treats me very well. he is a complete gentleman, he gets along with my family and i with his. I love him but i find that over the past couple of months i'm getting very irritated with certain things he does. we have discussed these issues multiple times but i feel like he's just not listning. Amungst my frustrations i have noticed that i'm not looking at him the way i used to. I find myself having a pretty big crush on a friend of mine that i've known for about 6 months. He and i both have much more in common than my boyfriend and i do and i feel a great connection to him. I don't want to just rush off and leave my boyfriend because i do care very much about him and i would love for things to work out but i feel like things are just hitting an end. I'm leaving on a month long trip to australia with my family and i know it will be a nice break for the both of us and it might be enough time for me to sort through my feelings about this situation but i need to know if the feelings i'm having for my crush are normal or not. I'm personally worried that my boyfriend now is just a long time rebound from the past two relationships i've been in.
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female
reader, bash1121  +, writes (25 September 2012):
hello I see that you are not sure what to do aout the way uou feel for your boyfriend and your friend..I also had the same problem myself I didnt know what to do but everyday just keep getting wores I would get mad for almost everyhing he did...he was the sweetest guyi been with but we cant stop what we feel and if your not happy its not going to get any better.you have to make yourself happy before you can make anyone alse.it might be a really hard thing to tell him bt its somethng thats needs to be done.it wasnt easy for me i had the hardest time even tho i didnt feel the same as i used to it still really hurt me to no i was hurting him but i want him to find someone who will care for him like he did me..i wish you the best of luck
A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (1 September 2009):
 Hi,
I think you need to let your current boyfriend go.
It is not fair on him that you are entertaining thoughts for another guy . Now I am not saying this is a bad thing, you are still very young, it is natural for your priorities and feelings to change as you get older and mature. Inevitably this will mean that you start to disconnect from certain people in your life and move on to other people and different things.
At the moment you are moving on from your current boyfriend, just do the right thing and let him down easily.
Don't mistake affection for him for love.
Believe me if certain things about him are annoying you now after 1 year, after 5 years you will be at the end of your wits.
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A
female
reader, colombian2009 +, writes (1 September 2009):
Specially when we have problems with our boyfriend and get too close to a friend and are understood by that guy we start having a crush on our "friend". SO that's absolutely normal. It's happened to me that's why I kinda get a little away from guy friends when I'm dating someone and it's seroius, cause it's very likely to get us confused. My advise to you is do not break up with your bf and try to find out if he still feels the same about you. If he does just give time, go to the trip with your family, try to do not be very in touch with your friend on this time. At lwast not more in touch than with your own boyfriend. After you come back make the decision between your boyfriend and your friend. But remember this: a guy is often better as a friend than as a boyfriend. So take your time to make sure that you know what your feelings are and to know how both your bf and friend feel about you. Then make your decision. Good luck!!I hope I helped u
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