A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Can a relationship work if you get on well with a person but don't have much physical attraction? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (15 June 2013):
I have read the previous answers and felt I had to give an opinion here. I personally think it depends on the person, women in general can overlook the fact that their companion/partner is not very aesthetically pleasing (read good looking)
this can vary depending on the age of the person, the personality & of course the level of attraction this person has to her companions other traits. I have gone out with people who are not what most consider handsome, however I was able to overlook this because I found the person inside pleasing.
think of it this way: you may have a friend or 2 who are not particularly beautiful, however you see the person inside & if someone were to say to you ''she is ugly'' you would most likely react with surprise or even be offended on your friends behalf. I think it is the same SOMETIMES with romantic relationships. good luck and hope this answer was somewhat helpful :)
A
female
reader, shrodingerscat  +, writes (15 June 2013):
 If it's a platonic friendship yes.
If it's a romantic relationship, absolutely not.
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A
female
reader, haribo158 +, writes (15 June 2013):
In my opinion no, it's sometimes sad and annoying but no matter how much you like someone's personality, ultimately if you're not physically attarcted the relationship is ultimately doomed. As you feel attarcted to the person's personality, you may begin to feel physical attraction to them, but this is generally fleeting, sort of a honeymoon phase thing, it will quickly die. Once it has, unfortunately you'll generally find yourself not wanting to have sex with him and even having a wandering eye, and everyone gets hurt. Sorry it's not perhaps the answer you were hoping for!
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A
female
reader, llifton +, writes (15 June 2013):
 didn't work for me. i dated a wonderful person who was my very best friend in the whole world. we had an extremely healthy and emotionally stable relationship. but i didn't want sex. i found myself beginning to develop a wandering eye and i'm NOT a cheater. i had to break it off. we are still fantastic friends to this day. to me, the emotional AND physical attraction is a must. good luck.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2013): Depends on what kind of relationship you want with that person.
I mean, you can have a great friendship with someone of the opposite gender without any physical attraction, it will feel like you're siblings for example.
But for a romantic relationship, without physical attraction sooner or later at least one of the partners will become very disappointed because romantic relationships are supposed to be monogamous, i.e. if you're "with" someone then you're not supposed to be "interested" in other people. But if you have no physical attraction with the person you're "with", then what's to stop you from becoming "interested" in someone new who is more physically attractive to you??
Romantic/intimate relationships are the only relationships that are supposed to be monogamous or exclusive. With friendships - you can have as many friends as you want. With parent-child relationships - you can have as many parental figures in your life that you want, if you are fortunate to have many older relatives and friends take on that role to you. But once you declare that someone is your romantic/intimate "partner" then you're not supposed to be interested in anyone else for that role. So if you're not physically attracted to the person that you've declared to be your partner, it's only a matter of time before you start getting interested in someone more attractive then that's a problem since you're supposed to be monogamous.
This applies no matter how old you are. I mean, ever see old married couples sharing a romantic kiss with each other on their 50th wedding anniversary? This is like the gold standard of relationships isn't it? We all say how sweet that is, that they are still in love with each other after all those years. If their relationship had NO physical attraction to each other at all, then they are like any other people - they could find someone else attractive and want to pursue that.
that is not to say that physical attraction is the most important thing for a relationship, but if it's to be a relationship that is (a) monogamous and (b) including physical intimacy, then if there is zero attraction it would make for a rather big disappointment.... and chronic disappointment with someone tends to lead to other relationship problems with them...
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 June 2013): depends on your age range.
For young people, physical attraction is very important. But as you get more mature, you will learn that there are more important values.
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