A
male
age
36-40,
*A123
writes:Ok...So I broke up with a girlfriend of 3 years back in June. She was staying at my house and a girl I knew from the pool room I worked in, invited me to stay at her place. I was kind excited because she was roomies with a girl i worked with and she was going through a breakup with her boyfriend at the time as well. Anyway..one thing leads to another and we've been together ever since. The sex life was great and we didn't have any problems. Since about september it's like pulling alligator teeth to get her to have sex with me. Not to mention the fact that when we do have sex, she's just ready for me to be done from the start. She refuses any kind of foreplay and will never try new positions or anything (we have about 4 and that's it). \She tells me that she cares about me, and that she's attracted to me, bla bla bla and my answer is always...."well then why don't you act like it?" We fight constantly and it's because we don't have sex. Not fighting about the topic but when we're not having sex we are at eachother throats all the time. Someone please help!!!!!!!!!!!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Mrs. Mom +, writes (12 March 2009):
 It sounds like there's a mismatch between your sex lives. If she's a really wonderful person who you'd miss from your life, be honest with her that you need sex to happen more often and give her a chance to respond. If not, just move on.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2009): Yes, better to move on and be with someone who enjoys you.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2009): This happened to me with my ex. Lots of sex at first, then it dwindled down to nothing. We fought about it. I started to resent her for it. Finally we had a huge fight and broke up about it. A week later she called me back, said she loved me, and that she would try to get our sex life back on track. We had sex. The next day she broke it off, saying the spark was just gone and that we'd be better off as friends.
I was fine with that as I would rather be with someone that actually enjoys sex rather than puts up with it.
We really were better off as friends in that case.
Now I am with someone who loves sex with me as much as I love it with her.
I've been with this new girl for over a year now and we still have sex as much as we can. Its great!
If your girl has no interest getting the spark back, maybe you two are better off as platonic friends.
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