A
male
age
41-50,
*affaCake1234
writes:I was with the most amazing woman in the world! The time we spent together was the most amazing time I have spent with anyone. We got each other on every level. Mentally and physically! When things were good they were the best they have ever been! I am so in love with this woman!.... But when things were bad, they were bad! We both said and did a lot of horrible things to each other. More on my part I guess. We are now separated and have been for sometime. The thing is I can't stop loving her! I think about her all the time! I know she feels the same but so much badness has happened we just can't be together anymore. The thing is I've never felt like this about anyone. I don't know whether I am coming or going anymore. She was everything to me. My inspiration, my motivation, my angel, my world, my everything and I am totally lost without her. I would walk to the ends of the universe for her but I know there is no going back. How do I get over her though? Or do I not? I know this woman is the love of my life. She touched something inside me that no one else ever has. I miss her so much! We were never unfaithful or violent to each other. I just don't know what to do anymore?
View related questions:
violent Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, thinkb4  +, writes (2 February 2013):
Stating what these bad things were, that you both did, may help people to answer this better. If you was so in love with someone, you wouldn't have wanted do bad things to them. Someone has already suggested you are probably lonely right now. Whatever it is, I don't think going back to an incompatible relationship is a good move and you "need" to move on.
A
male
reader, Jimmy.L. +, writes (1 February 2013):
Doing bad things to each other is not ideal in any relationship. How do you get over her? Remind yourself of all those bad things what caused you to break up. You broke up for a very good reason. Dont forget that.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2013): There was something about your ex what brought out the worse in you. If you two got back together, then the chances are, that history would repeat itself. You are probably low and lonely right now.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 January 2013): i think you should tell her what youve told us here.Tell her you can't move on and you love her she's amazing etc.But in doing so, you'll have to compromise.Promise to correct all the errors that lead up to your break up, everything you both said or did that was "horrible" promise to never let it happen again.In you saying that all of it was mostly on "your part" means that you have to change and hope that she changes with you.I find that when one person in the relationship creats a level playing field, is happy go lucky, optimistic and all round pleasant then the other follows suit.And when things become heated and tense be the one to stop it and change the atmosphere, be the one of reason. promise this to her and hoepfully you can work it out.If not you will have to move on, you may never forget her, but remember this saying:"you never truely stop loving someone, until you find someone you love more"good luckxxx
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2013): Oh, why pine for the woman you love, just call her up and ask her out. Information on bad missing therefore you decide whether an appology is required from you and if you will do it again.
You cant stop loving someone , its not a tap that can just switch off , so be man enough and go after her or regret it for teh rest of your life.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2013): "The thing is I can't stop loving her!"The thing is you were inacpable of ever loving her.Normal, healthy, functional relationships do not consist of constant jarring shifts between the polar extremes of "amazing" and "horrible."Sounds like a textbook case of mutually compatible dysfunction with each simultaneously filling and feeding pathological needs in the other, classic example being a sadist hooking up with a masochist, someone who loves to inflict pain satisfying another's need to suffer pain and vice versa.I suggest you seek counselling as your grandiose method of expressing yourself indicates that your thinking may not be entirely rational; and even if you are thinking clearly and are simply overwrought, then you need to understand, come to terms with, and resolve the underlying issues that are driving your behavior lest you do or say something which will ultimately cause you, your ex, or a future object of your affection (obsession) embarrassment or hurt.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 January 2013): maybe you dont want to move on, maybe you shouldnt. maybe you two can get through this. you said you know she feels the same. how do you know this?I am in a similar situation, and your post breaks my heart. that expression "all is fair in love and war" comes to mind. some of the worst scenes and the most hurt feelings are often caused by those closest to us ie; our kids, our family, our partners. and some relationships only grow stronger and deeper as a result. With everything that has been said and done, how can we ever be together again? maybe im a dreamer , but isnt true love what all of us quest for in life? and why are rough tides a reason to jump ship? IF, there is a chance for the two of you, my advice is "DONT GIVE UP" dont give up on her, on "us" there is counselling, there are books, support groups. if there is an OUNCE of a salvagable relationship, and you're not done trying, then keep going.
...............................
|
