A
female
 ,
*mber
writes:Hey, this is gonna sound like a very weird problem. I used to be very intelligent, but for the past year or so I feel like I'm getting stupid, resulting in guys losing interest in me, as I can't even hold a conversation down. I never know what to say to guys. I've been hurt a lot for the past year as everyone thinks I'm a slut, only after sex and totally stupid....I don't wanna be like this..Please help. I'm crying myself to sleep almost every night from the pain. thanks Reply to this Question
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reader, becky05 +, writes (9 August 2005):
Do you feel like you are getting 'stupider' in general? If so then you may be having concentration problems. See your GP and tell him that you are having problems, he should be able to advise.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2005): If you having trouble maintaining friendships and establishing good romantic relationships, have you ever thought that problem might be low self-esteem?
What's happened to you in the past year (re: pain and hurt)
has made you lose your self-esteem and has affected the way in which you interact with men on dates. You may find it hard to believe, but low self-esteem projects itself. If you don't feel good about yourself, the other people will not be interested in you. I know it may seem impossible to do, but you HAVE to figure out how to start feeling better about yourself before you'll have any success with dating and carrying on conversations.
The stronger the spirit - the more optimistic, giving, kind, trusting, and creative the woman is-the more she is seeming attractive. This is because these qualities make for joy, for independence, for life, for beauty, for inner freedom. Making improvements to your self-confidence is not so complicated. Having an appreciation of what you can do. Having a true respect for our own abilities, and value. Knowing your strengths and trusting in them.
Accepting that other people perceptions about you do not determine who you are. It's a huge attitude change that you must undergo. A change for the positive. Take it day by day and don't let what's happened to you control your daily life. Look to yourself for your good qualities and feel good about yourself for those things. If you believe you’re good person who tries to help others, that’s a start to keep going and listen to yourself. Decide on what you want, figure out how you're going to get it, grab life by the short hairs and do it. Sound easy? It's as easy as you let it be..it takes a remarkable change of how YOU view yourself. Put the negative stuff behind you and start living your life in a positive, happy way..that happiness, that positivity will shine through. It may take a week, a month, a year. But you will get it back..from this day forward be determined...and persevere. Good luck and always remember...Do not allow, other people's perception of your control the way you feel about yourself. Be open to change.. be you...be happy.
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