A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi, im a 17 year old male. I am an average build man, not fat, not thin, (13stone). Iv'e neva had a girlfriend because of the following reasons:-a) Im far too shy to approach a girl and speak to her.b) Im obsessed with the perfect woman, you know, the ones you see in magazines etc.c) I don't feel confident with what i look like (clothes, style, body etc.)Is there any way that i could help change myself?, i've always felt that something is missing in my life, eventhough i am only 17, all my mates have a gf and i feel that im left behind.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 March 2007): i think u should take some acting classes. it may sound weird but it may really hepl build confidence. Im a professional actress on my way to hollywood so ive taken may classes.`no one is perfect and ull never find someone if u dont understand that. if its ur body u dont like,then change it, start going to the gym and start a diet.
A
female
reader, aunty t  +, writes (9 March 2007):
 You dont need to change yourself you just need to gain some confidence. Is there such a thing as the perfect woman? I dont think so. All the girls in these magazines look totally different without there makeup or hair done. Its their job. Judging girls on their looks is not a good idea. Would you prefer to go on a date with a girl you can sit and look at all night or someone with a great personality who makes you laugh and feel good about yourself. Do you have any close mates who could introduce you to some girls and who could give you a few pointers on your clothes etc. Remember if you can see past the perfect woman and see girls for who they are you will have a much better chance,
Best of luck
Aunty t
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A
female
reader, KAZZ +, writes (9 March 2007):
 Firstly I believe a 'perfect woman' is really UNDERRATED. You should see the person that you love as 'perfect' but not just based on their appearance, but on every quality they have.You should try and get over the hurdle of not being able to approach a girl and speak to her. Yes I know you're shy, but it shows a girl that you aren't to afraid to express any thoughts or feelings you may have. Once you do accomplish this you will see their is a lot more to a woman then just the 'perfect body' which quite a few men seek for.I don't think there is any immediate way you should change yourself, but try not to be too insecure about the way you look. There is probably nothing wrong with the way you look. If you are shy then yes it can be a difficult task to approach a girl. I understand that. Don't think that you need to change! if a girl likes you she is going to like you for your personality not just your looks.Don't worry about what your friends are doing. If I were you I would rather wait until I found someone that I really enjoyed spending my time with. I wouldn't try and find someone just because my friends are doing the same. It sounds like a mild form of peer pressure.Please don't worry, I'm sorry I couldn't be much helpKAZZ x
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A
male
reader, kendall17 +, writes (9 March 2007):
firstly get your confident up by maybe talking to girls you dont know then maybe move onto girls that you find attractive. to get out of the mode of liking the girls in mags i would refrain from looking at them this could help. lacking confidence is common. try get a girl who you are good mates with be truthful with how you look which will probably be fine and get them to reassure you. spend time with the girl you are close with, this build your confidence around girls and could help you with looking for a girl. good look and i know how u feel!
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