A
female
age
30-35,
*aiting 4ever
writes:i'm currently 19 years old, soon to be 20. i'm a virgin and have never been in a relationship. i've never met the "right" one, or have even tried looking. sometimes i feel like i'm a loser, like nobody likes me enough to want to be my boyfriend. i just want to date someone, you know? i don't want to expect to have a relationship out of a date, that's not how it goes. sometimes i get teased because i am still a virgin, and that i don't have boyfriend, but the teasing doesn't bother me. i'm so afraid i'm going to end up alone, that nobody, outside of family, will love me, or need me. my question is what is wrong with me? what am i doing wrong? is it because i'm too fat or annoying? what is so wrong with me that people just don't see that i could be a good girlfriend?
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female
reader, Zanie +, writes (27 May 2010):
 Wow, you just took me back a few years. That is exactly how I felt at 17. I know how you feel totally. I've always been a big girl, and I was always hyperactive and loud. I always thought, I will be alone forever.
The truth is though. You won't be. You have to get some confidence in yourself. My mom used to say, "Make the best of what you were given to work with" You can still be stylish, if youre a big girl, nerdy girl...etc. You can still be sexy because there is nothing more sexy than confidence! If you do the best for yourself, looking your best, makeup and hair and perfume and style... and you try to be outgoing and genuine. You'll meet someone who will like you for you.
As far as being a virgin, well, there isn't anything wrong with that. I know in the US... it seems like everyone is "doing it". Everything is so sexualized. However, you have to have sex on your own terms, when you think your ready. And I totally believe that your first time should be with someone you really love and care about.
Just give it time. It seems you always meet someone when youre never expecting it. During the time when I couldnt get anyone... I just improved myself. I did all the things I needed to do for me and before I knew it, I met someone.
If you want to get out in the dating scene, try looking your best and hanging with friends, going to social gatherings, clubs, bars, hobbies. There's even internet dating.
Good luck, and never ever think you're not good enough! Always think positively!
A
female
reader, BunnyTee +, writes (26 May 2010):
 Ok, wait, slow down here. There is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG with being a 19/20 yro virgin. Nothing at all. I think you're just being a smart girl, honestly. This is no race you're involved in, honey. You have a whole life ahead of you!
Just because you haven't met the "right" person with whom to share yourself yet does not mean you're destined to be this way all your life. Just be you, work on developing yourself into a strong, smart, educated, woman of discriminating taste and preferences. The other matters will find you soon enough. There is no rush towards an imaginary finish line. Just allow yourself to grow and flourish.
I doubt you're doing anything wrong in this.
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