A
female
age
36-40,
*mpressa
writes:Hi, im really depressed because i didnt expect that we gonna turned like this. we spent two years. i am 20 years old now and now my ex bf is 18 years old now. i met him when he was 16 years old and i was 18 that time. i am his FIRST TRUE LOVE,I AM almost his first in everything, we really loved each other,he experienced a very deep relationship with me...we've been in many down times together. he actualy dropped his school for me because he wanted to be with me, he was so jealous, proud that he has gf even im older than him, he fought out with his parents and he said he loves me because that time his parents didnt expect that their baby has a gf now, we went in many places, we shared many happy memories...and there were times we had so much fights but in the end we still love each other, i did many mistakes and hurt him too, but the love was there...and NOW we BROKE UP... recently, just last week, he told me that he wants space and he wants to be independent which i do understand because for a long time he was with me and he was dependent. and what hurts most is he has a new gf now and he told me that yeah he loves her but its not that like we had...that most of the people around us saw us how happy we were unlike his new relationship. his new gf is 14 years old and he is 18 now. but his parents still likes me because their parents did witness our love we had. and his parents are still want to talk to me and hoping to be with their son. now, he is studying again and has a better grades...i am sad coz he has new gf now...but he wants me to stay and he promised me if he will be back he wont loose me but do i still wait for him? i feel like a least option which i was not before. is he happy now? actualy we made promises that we gonna be together in time. but he told me that he is happy with his new girlfriend but i feel not like we were even his parents dont like the girl esp. his mother. im really sad...do i still have a hope with me? and the last time we were together we were happy...i feel that he loves me. please help me, and the what is that if talk so strong he makes dramas...that i dont love him anymore if im weak and crying he will says that i need to accpet the reality he has new gf now. but he keeps on saying i love you. i am the one who cut our communication coz i wat to move on but cant stop thinking of him. and he always saying that if someone will come to my life that guy will be lucky ect. PLEASE GUYS HELP ME OUT! i want him back...coz i really love him.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2009): I think you need to find a way to let him go. I know that you love and care for him and there so many special memories that you shared but at the moment he wants out and you need to respect his wishes. He has moved on and even has a new gf and you need to find a way to move on as well. I am not suggesting that you rush into another relationship. What you need to do is focus on you. You need to love yourself because quite frankly if you don’t nobody will. Don’t sell yourself short just because a man rejected you does mean that there is something wrong with you. Don’t waste a lot of time thinking and hoping that he will soon realise his mistake and return. Don’t even beat yourself up for the mistakes you made in the past that hurt him, although I recommend that you learn from them. Instead focus all your energies on you. Figure what you want in life and focus on them. Focus on your hobbies and do things that make you feel good about yourself. Exercise regularly for that helps a lot. And If possible cut links with him and his family. Don’t let them even indicate that they prefer you to her for that only gives false hope. Coming to think of it his family didn’t like you either in the beginning but he stood up against them and they later accepted you. I am certain he will do the same again. I feel your pain as I broke up with first love who was 5 years younger than me after a 6 year relationship and it totally tore me apart but what does not kill you will only make you stronger. Be strong
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