A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:my wife of 10 months wants to have mfm threesome but i dont think i want to. what should i do?
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male
reader, DKW  +, writes (8 August 2008):
Is it just the thought of more "man" during sex that does it for her, or does she really find other men attractive and wants to have one of them under the guise of a threesome?
If it's the first option, well there's a lot you can do with sex toys, dirty talk and imagination!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 June 2008): i think your wife is a little bored she just wants to spice it up a bit i want my wife to be the same way just find someone your both comfortable with
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A
female
reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (5 June 2008):
 if your not comfortable with the idea you just have to explain to her why you dont want to and she should understands if she loves you.. aphexy
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2008): This is just my opinion, but I have been there and done it, any man or woman that wants to have a threesome or take part in any unusual fetish is bored silly and screaming out for help in this case sexual satisfaction. She more then likely is not bored with you and probably loves you with all her heart but I don't think you satisfy her in the bedroom and she hasn't got the heart to tell you. Go be adventurous get a book or check out the internet for wildly exciting stuff to do to her and pick something dirty most women enjoy stuff that you would never believe them too, spice it up
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A
female
reader, sexseahot +, writes (3 June 2008):
 If you don't want to and she loves you, she will understand. You shouldn't have to do anything that you don't want to do, especially sexually. Just sit her down and let her know your reasons that you don't want to have the threesome and she should respect that choice.
Good Luck!
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A
female
reader, lexilou +, writes (3 June 2008):
 Tell her. Fantasies are one thing but the reality is often disappointing and can make you feel pretty bad aferwards or could leave to her wanting more and more, or could lead to an affair with the other men etc etc etc.
Try finding out what her other fantasies are and see if you can bring those to life instead, maybe a bit of roleplay or meet in a bar and pretend you dont know each other etc.
Good luck x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2008): I thought marriage contained vows? I am not sure why she wanted to marry you if she now says she wants to break the first covenant. Love I thought, pardon moi, was worth more than gold and I also thought people had some understanding of how to protect that and develop trust. Instead it all seems to be about "me, me, me". Sex is such a wonderful think but if folk get really selfish it turns into an ugly thing and doing threesomes takes the risk of breaking trust as well as tainting a relationship. You can tell her that 80% of relationships where people try this are borken up in two years. These are figures from Relate, which is the biggest UK counselling group. I get so frustrated that people can be so selfish and actually "thick". If you are single, fine get out there and go for it. Married though? What a thankless, tiresome, insecure and totally selfish world we live in.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2008): Tell her that you don't want to and why.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2008): Don't do it. If one man isn't enough for her, a dozen won't be too many. Try to find out why she wants to do this, and if there's anything you can do to remove the 'want' in her.
I suppose you could ask her if she fancied a FFM first? I'm afraid I don't have much hope of this marriage of yours standing the test of time if things like this are being brought up after onlyn 10 months.
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A
male
reader, Sandman +, writes (3 June 2008):
 I think phiatiger is spot on with what they said. Just let her know that you are not interested in this sort of thing and try to communicate to her why not. There are many reasons why someone would not want to do this - for me, it's simply the fact that I would NOT wish to share my wife with another man, or woman.
Like phia said, this is something that should have been discussed prior to marriage (during the experimental phases of life). If she's trying to find some new ways to spice up your sex life, there are plenty of things you two can do together that does not "actively" involve others.
I would stay away from this type of activity. If you do decide to go with it, be very clear on your expectations and what you do and don't want. But beware, lots of problems can arise from bringing in extra persons into the marriage bed.
Hope this helps.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 June 2008): Say no. Many people that do agree to threesomes, later find that they cause problems within their relationships.
If you are not comfortable with the idea then imagine the problems that would be caused if you went along with it. Gosh your marriage is still so new, I cant help but feel she should have told you that this is something she wanted to do and experimented before marrying you. Trying to make you feel bad about not wanting to share her is really going to create problems.
Be strong say no and try to create excitement within your relationship in other ways.x
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