A
male
age
,
*odger
writes: I am a young 86 year old in second marriage with splendid Christian service to a lady 14 years younger who has been splendid. I had a blood clot heart attack in March 2005 and have been looked after wonderfully. Also as a war disabled veteran extra care has occasionally been necessary but always given with love and dedication. We have had only one major disagreement of note. Yet a month before Christmas with the festivity in mind and life carrying on as normal my wife sudddenly and without giving reasons turned on an unrecognisable stern face to tell me she had had enough and could take no more. Our second anniversary is at the end of January. After an uneasy two weeks my wife suffered two days before Christmas what was thought to be an aneurysm but thankfull diagnosed as a slight stroke. Following this she was allowed into the care of her second son and daughter in law who has medical training and I have been on my own 12 miles away. But folowing the stroke my wife will not communicate with me either by spech or by letter or text. All my friends, my Doctor, Relate Couinsellors say I should not blame myself but be patient and allow her space. This I have done however difficult that has been. It is now 30 days and so far as I know my wife has not taken independent advise to open up her heart. I am convinced she has been bedaring other emotional burdens within her family but that in a showdown blood relationships may prevail first. Are vows still divikne and eternal law. Please assist. Podger.
View related questions:
anniversary, christian, christmas, disabled, text Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, melschatbox +, writes (24 January 2007):
WEll, Podger I don't think you can force her to come home. Just think how stressful and more upset she would be if you did that. If prior to the stroke she wasn't sounding like herself, it's possible it was due to lack of blood flow to the brain. Lots of strange behaviors take place when one's physical condition has gone awry. I say let her stay where she is and let her heal physically. Send her tokens of your love and affection. Don't give up on phoning her ...make sure she knows that you care. Make sure that her "blood relationships' are aware you mean her no harm or extra stress. I wish I could say more. I'm glad her condition was not more serious. At the ripe age of 86 you best not let the stress of this situation wear you down. Best Wishes.!!
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (22 January 2007):
Is it possible that your wife's health has affected her mentally? A mild stroke can cause disorientation and maybe she is confused and a little frightened. I would speak with her doctor and see if this is a possibility. In the meantime I know how upsetting this must be for you, hang in ther Buddy! Once she is on the mend I'm sure she will back to her own caring self. And A BIG THANK YOU for your service to your country!
...............................
|