A
male
age
51-59,
*panky25
writes:My wife is not interested in sex that much anymore. Maybe 1-2 times per month. However, her "easy way out" is to just give me a BJ once per week/every ten days or so.Is this normal? Although I love the BJ's, I feel I am missing the "connection" between us both.Thoughts?
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male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (2 August 2012):
 Well I very much agree with "eddie85." At least with most of his suggestions, especially that she may just want to keep you satisfied. Some women simply enjoy doing it, maybe even to the point of their own satisfaction. Most, however, prefer some reciprocation. I don't think that we can know, or even speculate, why your wife does that and avoids other activity, but agree that discussion with her is advisable. Frequent blow jobs are wonderful, but my preference has always been to precede with intercourse until the woman climaxes first.
A
female
reader, demeplev +, writes (2 August 2012):
 I agree with eddie85 in that she may just be going thru things but still wanting to keep you happy. Do talk to her us woman looove to talk..lol I found your question intresting because I have done this to avoid intimacy as well ...but I had a terrrible marriage and no longer married, beyond me why I would even have wanted to satisfy him and not think of myself..but sometimes people just do.
I would ask her tell her how important intercourse and intimacy is to you and your relationship Im sure you can get to the bottompof this easily. Good luck
Peace and love
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A
male
reader, eddie85 +, writes (2 August 2012):
 I think some women do this, mostly to keep their man satisfied. As women age, they lose their sex drive and some, as they hit menopause, begin to experience some dryness down there, so intercourse can become painful or uncomfortable. In addition, she may be having some body issues, where she sense she isn't attractive anymore and doesn't want to get naked and have you see her flaws.
I think you ought to be thankful that your wife goes that extra mile to keep you happy, but I do understand your frustrations.
As far as solutions go, I would recommend you have an open and honest talk with her. Try to calm any insecurities she has and tell her how you miss feeling close to her. Hopefully she'll reveal why she has been so hesitant to have intercourse with you.
If she is still avoiding intercourse, you may want to try to have an intimate massage before she performs oral on you or simply hold each other for a bit. You may have to be creative to re-achieve that physical intimacy again, but it will require an effort on both parties.
Good luck.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2012): Its a difficult question to answer as the reason for this could be one of many, theorising about the reason she is acting in this way will only make you worry about worse case scenario, and trying to change her behaviour without knowing the actual reason for it may have a slightly destructive effect. you should probably just talk to her, she will have noticed a difference in her behaviour and will probably welcome said conversation. ps i love BJ's too ;)
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