A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: I have a 23-year-old son, he's been in a relationship with his girlfriend for the last 18 months and everything's going well, he's got a good job, working in IT equipment sales and has a good social life.He lives with his best friend Steve who he's known since college, and they're great friends.However, it's what he wanted to do which is worrying me - he's told me he wants to have a civil partnership with one of his best friends, Steve, simply for financial/tax reasons. This worries me A LOT, as he's never done anything illegal before, and is this illegal?I know for a fact my son isn't gay, and Steve isn't either, he's got a girlfriend as well who he wants to move in with in the future(Steve's 26, my son's 23).I'm worried - what would happen if my son did have a civil partnership with his friend for financial reasons, what would be the fallout of this situation?My husband is extremely stressed-out about this, and we just don't know how to handle it, I need advice and would gladly appreciate it!!
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female
reader, Miamine +, writes (14 November 2011):
So he wants to "marry a man"... It's a marriage contract, no matter what he and his friend think, and it comes with legal responsibilities. What do the girlfriends say? They guys will need to get a divorce if they want to marry the ladies. What happens if they meet new women, how are they going to explain that they are not gay. Sorry mum, can't you lock him in his bedroom and take away his bike and ban his friend Steve from coming round to play? Nope, is he to old to be punished like that? Well nothing you can do I'm afraid.
Congratulations, your son is marrying a man, but he has a girlfriend. You must attend the wedding and take lots of pictures to put in the family album. Make sure that Steve's mother comes too. In exactly one year, these two young little boys will realize they made a big, big mistake, and then it's time for tissues as they cry on your shoulder. I hope that it doesn't break the love they have between them, it would be terrible if they couldn't remain friends. Well at least you get to keep the pictures as a reminder of the dumbest thing your son has every done. Maybe you could use them for blackmail if he ever has such a dumb idea again.
He's too old to punish, too clever to listen... ah, kids, don't you just love them, wait a little while and then you can laugh at his mistake.
A
male
reader, AvgGuy1 +, writes (14 November 2011):
It doesn't matter whether the parties involved are gay, straight, or in between. Entering into a domestic partnership for financial reasons... I believe is illegal. You really sould check into Canadian law with regards to the legality/restricts for doing so.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2011): Civil union for tax purposes? Same sex union. Just to evade the tax man? Sound very phony.
How does his gf view this "arrangement"?
U have reason to be worried. He will be outed by "well meaning friends/family". Whistleblowing is on the increase when it comes to fraud and unethical behaviour.
LoveGirl
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (7 November 2011):
I guess this would be up there with financial fraud.. and they usually punish white collar crimes harder than other crimes.
Now, might be it'll never be found out. But if found out, then I think you might be talking jail time here. It wouldn't take a genious to figure it out, if at one point the girlfriend moves in with them.
Not to mention the hazzle should he ever want to marry the girlfriend later on.
But for now, it's not a real plan is it? It's an idea? I think let them sort it out, and this idea might just fizzle into nothing once he and his friend start to look into the paperwork. I suspect the girlfriend is objecting too? In the case that she isn't, you could try to sweet talk her and point out how he should be marrying her and not his friend.. perhaps.
Maybe your son also needs to be reminded that whatever money he earns, or apartment he buys, while married, will by default also become Steve's... So if Steve happens to get unemployed, guess who he will be mooching off of, completely legally since they are married... Remind your son of that, and see if he thinks tax benefits are worth it.
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (7 November 2011):
This sounds like fraud. Fraud usually ends in prison. So, this is not a good plan on behalf of your son. There's a real risk that he'll wind up in trouble.
And I am fully aware that you think your son isn't gay - but are you really, really sure about that because I can't see the girlfriends being happy about this, and if your son and Steve split, then that would make for a pretty interesting court case.
Bad plan all around unless your son is, in fact, gay and has been hiding it for a long time.
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