A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I am 18, I have been with a man since I was 16 (legal in the UK) and he is now 49. Due to this no one else in either of our lives knows about us being together. In the last 6 months we have tried to end it, but neither of us are able to break it off. We have too much fun together, and I'm not talking sex, we waited a year until we had it and often just talk and laugh and kiss. We know our time together is finite and that's why we've tried to stop seeing each other. I need help to see why I need to stay strong and why we need to stay apart, thank you!!! Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell we said maybe this is the time to end it type things and ended up caving in and saying we wanted to be back together. I think I should have mentioned as well that I'm not looking for a serious relationship at 18!! Just something casual. It has grown to be a bit more than that, and I know he really likes me, I can see it in his actions and hear it in his words (chances are I will just get attacked and told that he's lying to me by one of the aunts, but I know he's not!)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 April 2011): You are old enough to make your own decisions, but if you really want to end this, then it means to CUT ALL CONNECTION with him. Can you describe to me HOW have you both tried to end it? Because if you both were still contacting each other while "suppose" to end it, it doesn't work that way. You may not like this but to end all connection, it means to STOP talking to him, STOP hanging out with him, STOP messaging him, STOP whatever you do with him. You can't stop thinking about him, but you can learn to shift your focus to other things. ONE contact with this man in any way, and you will be absorb back into this relationship again. It is not simple because of the chemicals (or bond) that you two have build over time. It is really the chemicals that keeps the relationship going. There are other factors that keeps this relationship going, and this chemical clouds your judgement about the other person. It makes everything foggy. IMHO, whether this relationship last or not, you must think of the long term of this relationship. Are you two just looking for a simple relationship or are you looking for more? Good luck!
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A
female
reader, Mazamoo +, writes (2 April 2011):
if it has been that long then i think it might be time to fess up to your loved ones, maybe start with whoever you are closest too, and tell them in confidence!!
Your old enough to make your own decisions now and you may find people to be more supportive than you first may think, especially if the love is that strong between you~!
give it a go ! and good luck!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 April 2011): "Love knows no boundaries" as they say. That would be a reason to stay strong.
At the same time, you're still really young. You have so much life to experience while he is most likely at a very different place in his life. Chances are you don't share the same goals and same beliefs at this point in time. Sure there's no harm in having fun together, but do you see this relationship being long term?
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