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My relationship is on rocky ground and to top it all I've found out I'm pregnant! Now I don't know what to do.

Tagged as: Dating, Pregnancy, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (11 January 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 12 January 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I have just found out im 6 weeks pregnant. I'm 23 and have only been with my boyfriend for a few months. The last few weeks we have been having a really bad patch, always arguing.

He says he wants me to keep the baby but i dont know what to do about him or the baby. I have a full time job and am worried how people there will react too. Please help!!!

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A female reader, tysgirly13 United States +, writes (12 January 2010):

Well, It is my belief that you are old enough to keep the kid. I personally am not against abortion of the circumstamces are correct. I do believe that you should keep the baby.

As for you and your boy, you will work things out. I have been with my boyfriend for nine months now. I am going to tell you straight up that after the fourth month things turned into a living hell. There was not a day that went by that we were not in a screaming fit. The best thing you can do it talk out your issues. It doesn't get better quickly. With a youngster along the way it will rekindle your flame. I am almost 100% positive of that.

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A female reader, Denise32 United States +, writes (12 January 2010):

Denise32 agony auntThis is really very difficult for you. You need to sit down and have a good talk with your boyfriend at a time when you are both calm and can talk and listen honestly, without getting upset. But all things considered, that might not be so easy.

You basically have three choices concerning your pregnancy:

You can choose to go through with it and raise the baby on your own - of course I expect you know that involves an enormous amount financially (even with government help) for at least the next twenty years, and will consume all your time and love.......you'll have to find baby sitters and day care if you want to continue working. Plus the fact that your boyfriend may not want to support you or his baby either emotionally or financially.

Or, you could choose to give birth and then put the baby up for adoption. There are a lot of childless couples who would love to have a baby to raise and give a loving home to. It's my understanding the birth mother can if she wants to, have at least some contact. I'm really not familiar however, with how this would work. I know sometimes women who gave up their baby for adoption, years later sought him/her and the parents out.........

And of course, the third option is abortion. Nor would this be easy. You need to be prepared to go through an emotional seesaw if you choose this. If you do choose abortion, it wouild be best to do it very soon, before the baby becomes too far developed. I know this is means a lot of soul-searching and is emotionally wrenching.

I would advise you to find a good counselor you can talk with to explore your options and come to a decision you feel you can live with.......

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