A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Someone please try to advise me. I cannot believe the awful situation I now have in my relationship. Were not married, but I live with my 4 year old daughter and her mother. Her mother does not love me, she only wanted a child to trap me into a relationship for financial gain. I feel a total idiot for falling for it. So here I am 4 years later and whenever I say something she does not like she totally ignores me, walks off into another room and refuses to enter into a conversation about it. If I persist she will then accuse me of not respecting her right to not talk to me. It makes me so mad. I feel like she does this intentionally to make me angry. It never used to happen, it started about 6 months back and now she does this ignoring thing about once a week. I feel that this is the last straw. I can accept the fact she refuses to share a bed with me and I can even deal with not having sex for months on end, but refusing to talk to me or even talk about why she refuses to talk to me just drives me mad. I feel totally unhappy in this relationship and have done for more than 2 years now, but we have a daughter together and I cannot deal with not being with my daughter if me and her mother separate, which is essentially what I think I need to do. Can anyone think of any advice for me ? We no longer live in the UK and my daughter does not have a British passport. I dont know if there is any way I can obtain custody and take her to the UK, but I do know that her mother does not have the financial capacity to support me daughter and the only property she could live in, is her parents home which is essentially a little more than a ruin with no heating.Please try and help someone, I dont know what to do. A few months back we went to see a lawyer about joint custody if we were to separate and now she refuses to go back to see the lawyer. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (5 December 2012): You dont need her to come with you to obtain legal counsel, go by yourself and find out your rights...then you have some facts to work with...good luck
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (4 December 2012):
 Agreed... see the lawyer without the mother of your child...
and figure out what you need to do to get custody and get her a proper passport so you can take her where you want to go.
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A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (4 December 2012):
 No idea what country you are in but you need to go back and see the lawyer yourself. If the child and her mother were born in the country you now live in, it's unlikely you will be able to bring your daughter back to the UK without her mothers consent.
Are you supporting your partner financially? Are you working? Are you living with her at her parents home?
It seems the relationship is dead, but if you have the option to stay in the same country as your child that would probably be better for you.
You need professional advice because you are in a very complicated situation.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2012): well since you have the money to get a lawyer. let a lawyer handle this matter. obviously she will just ignore you and for her to pay attention a lawyer should interfere. I could not think of any best solution as on how to deal with a person like that.
if you cant tamed her, let your lawyer do so. Good luck...
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