A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:i seriously hate the way i look - my reflection makes me feel sick n i cant stand myself most days. some people say im ugly, others tell me i have nice eyes n am pretty but i still see an ugly girl when i look in the mirror. my main problem is talking to people - i have plenty of friends but my problem is in giving eye contact when people, especially boys, are speaking 2 me. i struggle because i dont like the idea of them looking right at me because theyll be able to see just how ugly i am n i fear thisll make them not like me. im the only person i know who has this problem - am i wierd? what can i do to make myself give eye contact? X Reply to this Question
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female
reader, MichaelaxLiam +, writes (16 April 2009):
look this is quite strange your just too self contious you need to understand you are who you are iif a guy likes you than they do if they dont than there dicks they probbly dont know how much of a nice girl you probbly are and how nice your personality is just having a laugh around and just being you nothing your trying to be guys love that
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (22 April 2008):
 Beauty is in the eye of the beholder and not what you see in your reflections.
There are two kinds of beauty , physical beauty and beauty of the soul.
Physical beauty does not last but beauty of the soul lasts forever.
Everyone is unique and everyone is beautiful in their own way.
If you have love for mankind, you will see everything is beautiful.
It is just all a matter of perceptions only.
If you feel good about yourself , you will see things beautifully.
You need to think positive always and feel positive and you will attract the positive to you.
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A
male
reader, rproctor  +, writes (21 April 2008):
Looks are not something to beat yourself up over and good looks are really just an opinion. I know some men who say that a skinny girl turns them on, while some say heavy girls do it for them, some like brunette, some like blond. Its all a matter of opinion. Most people are insecure of their looks, usually within their teen years, but generally look beyond those self conscious aspects as they get older. I struggled with thinking I was ugly, just as everyone else does.
The only thing that i can say about looks is that it will help immensely to keep yourself well groomed and neat. Dont leave your hair a mess, dress for confidence, speak proper (maybe not a grooming thing), brush your teeth, etc etc. There is a fine line between being unattractive and gross...
I would say that you should focus on confidence and not let the skin deep beauty consume you. Just because you think you do not look good does not mean that the rest of the world thinks the same way.
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A
female
reader, duskyrowe +, writes (21 April 2008):
 People who tell other people that are ugly, are shallow,nasty and egocentric jerks. It is an absolute myth that people only go for looks, there are other qualities that attract people eg sense of humour, personality, how they carry themselves and people who are confident with themselves.
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A
female
reader, sub.rosa +, writes (21 April 2008):
Your problem isn't with people it's with how YOU view yourself. Poor body image is common and the only solution is to change your attitude. Confidence is sexy. You've probably heard that a million times. But confidence not only makes you look good...it makes you FEEL incredible and when you feel great the way you interact with people will change for the better in major ways. The following exercises are designed to allow you to see the truth about poor body image and, if properly done, will put you in the right mindset to start building confidence.
1. Ask yourself what you are gaining by fixating on negative thoughts about your appearance.
2. Stop obsessing over your reflection. When you do use a mirror...make eye contact with your reflection and COMPLIMENT yourself. Yes, out loud.
3. Excercise. It boosts self esteem, it's healthy, and those endorphins kick ass. You will feel fantastic.
4. Wear clothes that make you feel great. It's not superficiality...feeling good in what you wear allows you to project a stronger image.
5. Make a list of AT LEAST 10 good qualities about yourself. Repeat them to yourself if you start thinking negatively about your appearance.
6. Engage in activities you enjoy, associate with people you love, do what makes you happy. You can't feel good about your appearance if you're not happy in other areas of your life.
Do those things daily. ACT confident even if you don't feel it yet...you will.
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A
female
reader, neveragain770 +, writes (21 April 2008):
YOu have to love yourself first. Your problem sounds like what my problem was. YOu look at yourself and wanna be like the models, people on tv or, pretty girls that you see everyday but what you dont know someone may look at you and be like i wish i looked like her there's always someone that wants to be like you. What i did and i'm not saying this is going to be ez but change your normal way you dress and be more out going be the one to talk first and say hey. most important LOVE YOU because even tho you have family and friends you came in the world alone and going to leave alone so love you and if anyone else don't like it the next person will just love you. hope i helped a little.
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A
female
reader, jenxlovesxyou +, writes (21 April 2008):
 this is normal trust me...alot of girls think they are ugly because some people say so..but truth is every girl is pretty no matter how you look..i know it might not make sense at first but go into the bathroom or any where you have a mirror look straight into it and say "im pretty the way i am no matter how i look and no matter what people say" over and over and you will start to feel a lot confident and possibly be able to give eye contact if you still have trouble when you are talking to someone look them in the eyes and say that in your head just make sure you dont say it outloud lol..but you can not have the fear of ugly take over you..all gurls have this problem its not just you.
good luck dear
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