A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I need a little advice. I have been with my partner for almost 6 years, we got married last summer and I have always believed it was the best thing ever. However things have been a little odd lately. She seems to have lost her sex drive entirely, in fact she did kind of tell me that she doesn't really think of sex at all and not really about me in that way. We are good friends, have a lot of fun together, but I am getting a little frustrated.Added to this an old friend of hers has popped back up again from Sweden and she is stunning.. I feel a little inadequate in comparison. I know my partner has been emailing and msn's her. They comment on how they lost the opportunity to have a relationship six years ago as neither took the first step. Although I have been assured that nothing is happening now and they are just friends, I can't help but feel a little jealous as I believe that she has been hanging at work and not coming home earlier in order to talk to her.I really feel that my partner is a little confused, we had an almighty row the other day as on a rare occaision she prompted sex it was after talking to the Swedish girl and even mentioned her at one point. I really don't know what to do, I don't think she even sees the marriage as I do, she focuses on the legal protection to offers rather than anything romantic.Please help, I'm quite sad about this but can't really talk to anyone....
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female
reader, TELLULAH +, writes (19 January 2007):
 Oh poor you,
You could be barking up the wrong tree about your friend, but under the circumstances its not surprising is it. You need to sit down and talk about this, otherwise how can you sort it out. Had she gone off sex before her friend came back on the scene?. If so, you will more than likely be able to sort out the problems. But if this has been happening since her mate came back, i would be extremly cautious. It could be you being insecure, but i would be worried myself. All you can do, is ask her to be honest with you. If she is having an affair, you have the right to be told, then at least you can decide on your acctions. Being kept in the dark is the worst feeling in the world.
Its better to know, and then deal with it.
Hopefully you have nothing to worry about.
godd luck
A
male
reader, Dagwood  +, writes (19 January 2007):
 Hi Anon. Sorry to say this but it seems her interest level has dropped. It's natural that not having sex is frustrating, we're human and we need the intimacy making love gives us. Was the sex great before? Did it slowly get worse? Has your appearance changed? So many things could be the cause of her sudden loss of interest. Maybe the Swede was seducing her online and she is lusting for her?
This is obviously not making you happy so you really need to discuss this with her at the right moment. Tell her exactly how you feel and that both your needs are important and you don't think you'll be able to have a platonic relationship with her. Be confident, don't get desperate. I hope it goes your way. Stay in touch and take care.
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