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female
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anonymous
writes: Well, i have been with my partner for just over 3 years and we have a son together. last year i found out he had been texting my best friend for 5 months we nearly split up over it but i tried for the sake of my son. Since then i think i have fallen out of love with him and i havent been happy since the texting business. A few weeks ago i met this man and we exchanged numbers and have been talking ever since. we have become really close and he wants to meet up again. I am unsure of what to do as its so close to christmas and my sons 2nd birthday. I dont want to rock the boat to much as it wouldnt be fair on my son. Help!
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female
reader, Lemonpixie  +, writes (27 October 2006):
 Well first off if you know how much it hurt you... why would you do it to someone else? I think you should really talk to your partner about what you are feeling. Like stina said counseling is key to this. Cheating is not the answer... Why put yourself in that situation. Honestly 'staying together for the kids' is not always best. Your son is young the divorce wont crush him at this age he will grow up knowing his mom and dad arent together and copes accordingly. I can say this because personally my parents divorced when I was 1 and a half and it is all i know so it wasnt a big deal.
If you want to work it out do so, if you don't then i suggest you talk to your husband about that
A
female
reader, Astrid  +, writes (27 October 2006):
 I seriously agree with stina unless you both want an open relationship
good luck
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A
female
reader, stina +, writes (27 October 2006):
 Hi Anon,
I don't understand why you're out meeting new guys instead of trying to make the relationship that you're currently in work. If you stayed with him, you should try to work on the relationship. If you don't, then why did you stay with him? Have you tried counseling sessions with your partner? Have you discussed (not argued) in full detail what happened with your partner and best friend? Have you gotten anything out of that discussion - resolved issues, etc?
If you two have done everything you could to save the relationship, then before you go off with this other guy I think it's best to split up with your partner. What good would it do you to cheat on him? How would that make it any easier further down the road? And how would your son view his mother once he finds out what's been happening. It's bad enough that his father cheated already. What kind of role models are you giving to your child?
I know that there are a lot of questions in my response to your post, but you have a family you need to consider here, too.
Take care.
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