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My new man and I just don't click sexually! Help!

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 December 2006) 3 Answers - (Newest, 20 December 2006)
A female age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I had sex with my new boyfriend a few nights ago and I didnt enjoy it. Ive just come out of a long term relationship (3years), infact I kinda left my X for him. Ive spent months dreaming about our first time together but it didnt go as well as I hoped. He's very inexperienced, which I knew, but I couldnt get turned on, I mean wet, and it was so painful I had to ask him to stop several times, something that has never happened before. Is it normal for this to happen? I mean my X just knew how to turn me on in seconds, but the other night it was like we just couldnt click. I love my new guy so much, do we just have to get to know each other sexually?

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A male reader, santino +, writes (20 December 2006):

Well first of all I think that if he asked you did you enjoy it you should a been honest with him. I know you dont wanna hurt HIS feelings but Im pretty sure this guy likes you to be direct. I'd say he'd be pretty hurt to find out that you weren't straight with him, i mean it was his first time and you knew that. I think you should cut him some slack and give hime a chance. You knew how inexperienced he was before but but even so youre not making an allowance. I'd say hes pretty hurt right now......

Eoin

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A female reader, Katylouise +, writes (10 December 2006):

Hunny you need to relax cos by the sounds of it you were probably a little nervous with it being a experience with e new guy. Next time you want to have sex play some soft music spritz your fave perfume that makesyou feel sexy and have a glass or two of wine for dutch courage. Take things slow and tell him what turns you on in the bedroom you have to let him know what you love and if hes not doing something spot on just direct him to the spot. You both need to guide and help each other to start with and once he knows what you like and you know what he likes theres no going back for you then. good luck

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A reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2006):

Well u said he's ur new boyfriend, so just give him some more time to get to know what u like or what turns u on. Is it his first time? I'd actually be happy to know that he's not too experienced in it, because it could mean he hasn't had many partners before or something like that. You've also mentioned that your ex knows how to turn u on right away, but then the difference is that u've been with ur ex for 3 yrs. So i dont' know what else to say, just give ur new bf a chance, he'll learn eventually.

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