A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My mum's using the fb date site and she adding all these guys for friends and flirting with them. I want her to stop because it shows up on fb to everybody thats her friends and some of them are my friends and relatives. She's acting like a slut and its making me lose respect for her and I'm embarrassed. How do I tell her nicely to stop it because she's being trampish and people are trashing her behind her back. Why cant she go to a different date site? fb is the worst place to be doing that kind of thing. I don't want my mum being tacky. Can somebody tell me how to respectful of her and me? She's being a foolish sleezy slutty bucket child.help help help!
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male
reader, IHateWomanBeaters +, writes (5 January 2012):
 It seems liek you are ashamed of your sexuality, and are a victim of propaganda. That is how you meet the right person.
Divorce is part of 60% of marriages in the USA. It is higher in other countries. Tradition is a sham way to meet "the one". The way to meet the write down exactly what you want, show it to 1000 people, send exactly what you want and are looking for to all 1000 of those people that you pick, and go from there.
If you don't like the responses, you move on and say it won't work.
Your mom is a human and she needs sex just like you do. She is probably realizing that the people that will judge her for flirting with other people are not worth keeping anyway.
What she is doing is forging a relationship with chemistry in it from the beginning. These relationships always work out. Just because she is flirting with someone she finds attractive, it does not mean that it is only about sex.
The people that talk behind her back because she flirts and disrespect her because she flirts are not only people that don't love her, but they are cowards.
You want a good life and one that has no baggage? Get rid of the people that are backstabbing COWARDS that talk behind your back.
If I call you friend, I won't talk behind your back, I will step in front of a man with a gun and have done that for a friend. Why? Because I am their FRIEND not a judgmental hypocritical afraid child in an adult body.
Unless your mother was an abusive bitch that tortured and beat you as a child, the other relatives and friends come after your mother, not before. You defend her against them. If you want, tell her how she can make certain posts available to only certain people or none at all.
Best of luck to you!
A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (5 January 2012):
 I agree with Tisha! Well put.
And I'm sorry you Mom is acting like this.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2012): Based on all your descriptors that are far from loving- you have issues that were going on before this new platform to come online and further disparage your Mother by your unkind, unloving, unforgiving, hateful, spiteful, ugly, abusive words.
I get you probably feel its all out of your control, but constructive venting and sharing of your concern would come across as more genuine for your Mother which is not the case.
Its about you. And I understand that we children often see our parents of extensions of ourselves in that if another says ill of our parents, they say ill of us as well.
So I get you are embarassed about it all.
I say you need some counselling. You somehow fault Mom and blame her for her behaviour and yet, in no way do you give us concrete examples as to what 'trampy' behaviour is.
Also these so called family members on Moms side or Dads side?
I have a thing about Family Loyalty. A part of that is honouring our parents and using constructive means to communicate our needs.
You are no better to come here and say such words and use such descriptors against your Mother. I'd call that hypocritical. Its not even justifiable.
Even if Mom was not behaving best I would be ashamed to say such things against her.
In Fact I have NEVER said such a hateful, hurtful thing against My Birth Mother and believe me, she is no saint. My Birth Mother was someone who was severely abusive to me physically, emotionally, mentally. The horrors I endured and yet, I still have the grace to not say such things against her. She is still My Mother.
I think being honest and sharing your feelings with out the HATE, HURT and BLAME, and telling her what you hear and how you are struggling with it all will do wonders.
Also ask if she can tone it down or, maybe tell her to clean up her facebook and boot you and family members out and keep only those who she can trust in in her Facebook why sheilding you from her private life.
Let Us Know How it Goes!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2012): As Tisha said just teach her proper facebook etiquette. It's just a matter of not using it properly.
My mother posted on my aunts wall about her constipation a few months back. Very embarrassing indeed. I just showed her how to send private messages.
Don't call your mom a slut any more either. She's earned to right to a little respect from you hasn't she? The one person who should never judge her. You're raised OP her job with you is done, she is allowed to have a bit of fun now, but she just needs to be taught a bit of online discretion.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (4 January 2012):
 What Tish said.
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (4 January 2012):
 "Mom, let me give you a Facebook tutorial. It seems like you don't understand how to message people or keep things private, based on some of the posts I have read recently. I have certainly heard about some of these posts from family and friends and I don't want them to think you have some sort of mid-life sex crisis thing going on.
"To message someone, you push this button. If you post here, you are basically putting this out on a billboard for the entire world to read. Do you see the difference?
"I'm happy you feel sexy and attractive but the public flirting is really something that seems more like something a teenager would do. So when can I come over and show you how to use Facebook to enhance your life, rather than have it wreck your reputation?"
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2012): well you could just ask her nicely if she could change to a different datting site, because you have friends and family on fb and they can see most of the stuff she says.. and that you dont want people talking behind her back or lose respect for her and that you dont... i hoped that help abit :/
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