A
male
age
41-50,
*rizz74
writes:my ex and i split up a while ago......we did sleep together for sometime afterwards. whilst we were sleeping together i was messaging a friend of hers and now we have become a couple. my ex and i have kids together and we always got along well. since i hooked up my new girlfriend my ex tells me nothing about what she is doing and who she is seeing.... i get annoyed as i thought we were friends, she is also no longer friends with my girlfriend as she thinks what she did was wrong as she thinks friends shouldnt hook up with friends exes, which i think is stupid. she tells me i cant have my cake and eat it too. i miss her company and all she will talk about to me is about the kids. is there anything i can do to mend this relationship??
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male
reader, grizz74 +, writes (5 January 2012):
grizz74 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionok so i get your point..... she told me that this is the way it has to be and the kids are our only priority from now on. my girlfriends friends who are also friends with my ex no longer talk to her either which saddens her.... she used to tell me all the time what she would get up to but now nothing and she tells me to get over it.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (4 January 2012):
 Nope nothing you can do. You cannot have your cake and eat it too.
An ex is an ex for a reason and who she is with and what she does with them is NONE Of your business as long as it does not affect your relationship with your children.
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A
female
reader, thinkb4  +, writes (4 January 2012):
You can hardly blame her can you? She was still sleeping with you, which spells out her feelings were still very much there for you, or was really hoping you were getting back together. Fair enough, you could look two ways at you getting with her friend, but she may have been confiding in that friend about you for all you know. You were actually getting the ball rolling whilst you was still sleeping with her. If it had been a year or so after then some may have even forgiven it if your ex had moved on herself too. The timing was bad and how would you feel if it was the other way round?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2012): Be a gentleman and let her move on. Dating her friend is not cool so imagine if the tables were turned. If you really valued her company, you would have not slapped her in the face by becoming a couple with her so called friend.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (4 January 2012):
 Admit it, you just want to string her along. She has wised up, time for you to do the same Buddy.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (4 January 2012):
 Noice! Sleeping with one woman whie messaging her friend, did her friend know you were still sleeping with her? not that that matters much now.
It's none of your business what your ex is doing, or who she is seeing, too bad if you get annoyed, you bought this turn of events about by your own actions, maybe if you had thought with the head on your shoulders instead of the other one you wouldn't be in this situation.
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